SG v. MG, 2023 NY Slip Op 51063 - Nassau Co. Supreme Court 2023:
"PRELIMINARY STATEMENT
The Plaintiff moved by Order to Show Cause dated May 19, 2021[1]
(Motion Sequence No.: 001) seeking an Order: (A) Modifying the parties'
Stipulation of Settlement, dated September 26, 2019 and Judgment of
Divorce, dated January 30, 2022 entered in the County's Clerk's Office
on February 6, 2020, by granting Plaintiff sole legal residential and
decision making authority regarding the health, education and general
welfare of the parties' children: SN G (d.o.b xxxx, 2009), SS G (d.o.b.
xxxx, 2012) and CS G (d.o.b. xxxx, 2014); (B) Modifying the
visitation/parenting time schedule, as set forth in our Stipulation of
Settlement, dated September 26, 2019, so that the Defendant's
visitation/parenting time with the subject child shall be suspended, or,
in the alternative, that Plaintiff shall have supervised visitation
with the subject children by an adult whom Plaintiff approves or agency
supervision; (C) Directing the Defendant to submit to a hair follicle,
urine and blood test and any other test the Court deems appropriate that
will detect drug use by the Defendant through TASC, or such other
laboratory as this Court may direct and directing that such hair
follicle analysis test for drug use for a period of no less than six (6)
months prior to the filing this application; (D) Directing that
Defendant be restrained from operating a vehicle while the children are
in the vehicle while Defendant is under the influence of any
prescription medications or illegal substances; (E) An Order directing
Defendant ensures the children abide by the school policies as agreed to
in the parties' Stipulation of Settlement, dated September 26, 2019;
(F) Granting to Defendant such other and further relief as this Court
deems just and proper.
The Defendant moved by Order to Show Cause dated June 16, 2021
(Motion Sequence No.: 002) seeking an Order: (a) Granting Defendant, MG,
an Order of parenting time with the subject children for the Jewish
Sabbath this weekend, beginning on June 18, 2021 at 6pm until June 19,
2021 at 10pm; and (b) Specifically allowing the Defendant's new wife, B
C, a registered nurse, to supervise the Defendant's visitation with the
subject children until further Order of this Court; and (c) Modifying
the "Drug Testing" provision of the Stipulation of Settlement, dated
September 26, 2019 with regard to prescribed medications, appropriate
supervisors should visitations need to be supervised, and the
Plaintiff's ability to compel the Defendant to submit to a drug screen
at any time; and (d) Modifying the parties' Stipulation of Settlement
regarding the Defendant's parenting time; and (e) Granting Defendant MG,
an Order of counsel fees in the amount of $2,000; and (f) For such
other relief as this Court shall deem just and appropriate.
The Plaintiff moved by Order to Show Cause dated August 23, 2021
(Motion Sequence No.: 003) seeking an Order: (A) Directing the
Defendant, MG, to release the name of the rehabilitation facility that
he attended on about August 2019 to Plaintiff's counsel, Jonathan E.
Kroll & Associates, PLLC; (B) That upon releasing the name of the
rehabilitation facility, directing the Defendant, MG, to sign and
execute the "Authorization for Release of Health Information Pursuant to
HIPPA" allowing the rehabilitation facility to release all records of
Defendant to Jonathan E. Kroll and Associates, PLLC; or in the
alternative, directing the Defendant MG sign and execute a release
allowing the attorney for the children, Patricia Latzman, to release all
records received from the rehabilitation center to Jonathan E. Kroll
& Associates, PLLC; (C) An order directing the Defendant, MG, to
sign and execute the "Authorization for Release of Health Information
Pursuant to HIPPA" to Dr. Binyamin Tepfer of Tepfer and Associates to
release all records of the Defendant to Jonathan E. Kroll and
Associates, PLLC; (D) An order directing the Defendant, MG, to sign and
execute the "Authorization for Release of Health Information Pursuant to
HIPPA" for his, M.D. to release all records of the Defendant to
Jonathan E. Kroll and Associates, PLLC; and (D) An Order directing
Defendant to pay $3,500.00 as and for Plaintiff's counsel fees; and (E)
Granting the Plaintiff such other and further relief as this Court may
deem just and proper.
The Defendant moved by Order to Show Cause dated August 26, 2021
(Motion Sequence No.: 004) seeking an Order: (a) Reinstating the
Defendant, MG's, parenting time, pursuant to the parties' Stipulation of
Settlement, dated September 26, 2019; and (b) Specifically allowing the
Defendant's new wife, B C, a registered nurse, to supervise the
Defendant's visitation with the subject children until further Order of
this Court; and (c) Directing the Plaintiff to provide the Defendant
with her home telephone number so that he may have direct contact with
the subject children; and (d) Directing the Plaintiff to comply with all
aspects of the parties' Stipulation of Settlement, dated September 26,
2019, specifically the joint legal custody provisions; and (e) For such
other relief as this Court shall deem just and appropriate.
The Defendant moved by Order to Show Cause dated June 3, 2022 (Motion
Sequence No.: 005) seeking an Order: (a) Directing that the subject
children spend the Shavuot holiday weekend (June 3 - 6, 2022) with the
Defendant, MG; and (b) Reinstating the Defendant, MG's, parenting time
without any supervision; and (c) Granting the Defendant, MG, parenting
time with the children alternate weekends, from Friday until Sunday at
6pm; and (d) Granting the Defendant, MG, equal parenting time during the
few weeks between school and summer camp for the summer of 2022; and
(e) Granting the Defendant, MG, the right of first refusal to care for
the children instead of a babysitter; and (f) Immediately setting this
matter down for trial; and (g) For such other relief as this court shall
deem just and appropriate.
The Plaintiff moved by Order to Show Cause dated September 12, 2022
(Motion Sequence No.: 006) seeking an Order: (A) Modifying the parties'
Judgment of Divorce dated January 30, 2020 (Dane, J.), to the extent of
granting Plaintiff, SG, permission to relocate with the subject
children, to wit: SN G, born xxxx, 2009; SS G, born xxxx, 2012; and CS
G, born xxxx, 2014, to Silver Spring, Maryland; and (B) Implementing a
parenting time schedule for Defendant consistent with Plaintiff's
proposed schedule that is in the best interests of the children; and (c)
Granting the Plaintiff such other and further relief as this Court may
seem just and proper.
BACKGROUND
In these post-judgment proceedings, the Plaintiff was initially
represented by Jonathan E. Kroll & Associates, PLLC. The Defendant
has been represented by Natalie Markfield, Esq., On September 14, 2021,
the Plaintiff executed a Consent to Change Attorney form, substituting
the firm of Quatela Chimeri, PLLC, in place and stead of Jonathan E.
Kroll & Associates, PLLC. The subject children have been represented
by Patricia Latzman, Esq. (hereinafter referred to as the "AFC").
The parties were married on xxxx, 2006. They have three (3) children,
to wit: SN (born xxxx, 2009), SS (born xxxx, 2012) and CS (born xxxx,
2014). The parties' matrimonial action was settled by a written
Stipulation of Settlement dated xxxx, 2019 (hereinafter referred to as
the "Stipulation). The parties were thereupon divorced by Judgment of
Divorce dated xxxx, 2020 (Hon. Edmund M. Dane, J.S.C.) (hereinafter
referred to as the "Judgment). Thereafter, six (6) post-judgment motions
were filed by the parties which are summarized hereinafter.
On the presentment date of Motion Sequence No.: 001 (to wit: May 19, 2021), the following interim orders were issued:
IT IS FURTHER ORDERED, that the Defendant shall undergo hair
follicle drug testing, or such other drug test that will detect drug
use by the Defendant through TASC or such other entity as this Court may
direct to test for the use of drugs for a period of no less than three
months prior to the filing of this application pursuant to a separate
Order issued contemporaneously herewith; and it is further
IT IS FURTHER ORDERED, that pending a hearing of this
application, the Defendant shall not cut, dye, or bleach any hair on any
part of his body or use any substance in an attempt to alter the result
of any drug test administered to him.
A separate Drug Testing Order was issued on May 19, 2021 (Hon. Joseph H. Lorintz, J.S.C.).
On the presentment date of Motion Sequence No.: 002 (to wit: June 16, 2021), the following interim orders were issued:
ORDERED, that the Defendant-Father, MG, is granted an
immediate Order of parenting time for the Jewish Sabbath this weekend,
beginning on June 18, 2021 at 6pm until June 19, 2021 at 10pm; and it is
further
ORDERED, that the subject children are to be produced at the
Defendant's Wedding on xxxx, 2021, with supervisors M and B W; and it
is further
ORDERED, that unless otherwise agreed by the parties in
writing, the Defendant's new wife, B C, a Nurse Practitioner, shall be
immediately deemed an appropriate supervisory and shall be permitted to
supervise any and all visitation between the Defendant-Father and the
subject children until further Order of this Court.
On June 22, 2021, this Court issued a Short Form Order setting forth the following:
ORDERED, that the temporary order dated June 16, 2021, is hereby vacated; and it is further
ORDERED, that commencing on July 2, 2021, the Defendant
shall be entitled to enjoy alternate weekend parenting time with the
children commencing on Friday, one hour before shabbos, and ending on
Sunday, one hour after shabbos; and it is further
ORDERED, that Defendant shall be entitled to enjoy parenting
time with the children on Thursday's as set forth in the Stipulation of
Settlement; and it is further
ORDERED, that at all times set forth herein and at such
other times agreed by the parties, Defendant's parenting time shall be
in the presence of one or both of his parents (the children's paternal
grandparents); and it is further
ORDERED, that the Plaintiff shall be responsible for picking
up and dropping off the children for said parenting time; and it is
further
ORDERED, the terms of this Order shall be revised at the
next conference schedule for July 20, 2021 and are subject to
modification.
On the presentment date of Motion Sequence No.: 004 (to wit: August 26, 2021), the following interim orders were issued:
ORDERED, that, in addition to the parenting time granted to
the Defendant pursuant to the Order dated June 22, 2021, the Defendant
shall [sic] parenting time with the subject children on the Sundays in
which he has the children for Shabbat, from 9am - 7pm; and it is further
ORDERED, that, the Defendant shall have the children this
year for Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, and the second half of Succot,
pursuant to the Stipulation of Settlement; and it is further
ORDERED, that the children's step-grandparents shall be
immediately deemed an appropriate supervisor and shall be permitted to
supervise the Sunday visitation only between the Defendant-Father and
the subject children and B [sic] C may be present until further Order of
this Court; and it is further
ORDERED, that the Plaintiff is directed to give Defendant
her home telephone number so that Defendant may have direct contact with
the children.
On September 21, 2021, this Court issued a Short Form Order which
granted Motion Sequence Nos.: 002, 003 and 004 solely to the extent that
said motions were referred to a hearing. On February 8, 2022, an Order
on Consent was issued by this Court directing, in sum and substance,
that the parties engage the services of Kids in Common for Parenting
Education & Parenting Coordination, that the Defendant's parents,
his parent's in-laws, and that his current Wife, B C, be permitted to
supervise the Defendant's parental access, and that the Defendant
produce records of his last three drug screens to counsel for the
Plaintiff.
On August 11, 2022, this Court issued an Order on Consent of Plaintiff and Defendant, which, inter alia, provided:
ORDERED, that on consent of the Plaintiff and the Defendant,
neither parent shall discuss the issue of relocation with the children
pending further Order of this Court.
The parties thereupon executed a Stipulation, so ordered by this Court on November 18, 2022, which provided as follows:
1. The following shall be referred to the hearing currently scheduled for February 15th, 16th, 17th, and 23rd of 2023:
a) Motion Seq #1 — Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated May 19, 2021 — Branches A, B, D & E
b) Motion Seq # 2 — Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated June 15, 2021 — Branches C, D & E
c) Motion Seq #3 — Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated July 20, 2021 — Branch D-2
d) Motion Seq # 4 — Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated June 1, 2022 — C & D
e) Motion Seq #5 — Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated June 1, 2022 — C, D & E
f) Motion Seq #6 — Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated September 12, 2022
2. All other branches of pending motions not addressed herein are hereby withdrawn.
On July 7, 2023, this Court issued an Order on Consent of Plaintiff and Defendant, which provided as follows:
ORDERED, that the portion of the ORDER ON CONSENT dated
August 11, 2022, which directed that neither parent shall discuss the
issue of relocation with the children pending further Order of this
Court, is hereby RECALLED AND VACATED, on consent, and shall be of no
further force and effect, effective immediately; and it is further
ORDERED, that the parties are hereby permitted to discuss
the issue of relocation with the children, however, neither party shall
influence the children or cause any third party to influence the
children with respect to the issue of relocation.
The aforesaid branches of the aforesaid motions proceeded to a
hearing conducted before the undersigned Justice on May 30, 2023, May
31, 2023, June 1, 2023, June 15, 2023, June 16, 2023, July 10, 2023, and
July 21, 2023. An in camera with the three (3) subject children
was held on July 21, 2023. The matter was thereupon adjourned to August
11, 2023 for the submission of post-trial written submissions. The
submission date was adjourned on consent to August 21, 2023. The
submission date was thereupon adjourned again — over the objection of
the Plaintiff's counsel — to August 23, 2023. The submission date was
adjourned one final time, on consent, to August 24, 2023. Throughout
this Decision and Order, the Plaintiff will be referred to as the
"Mother"; the Defendant will be referred to as the "Father"; and the
three (3) children will be referred to either as the "children", the "G
children",[2] or by their individual respective names, where appropriate.
THE HEARING TESTIMONY
A court's custody determination is dependent in large part upon its
assessment of the witnesses' credibility and upon the character,
temperament, and sincerity of the parents. Matter of Gayle v. Muir, 211 AD3d 942 (2d Dept. 2022).
In addition, weighing the factors relevant to any custody determination
requires an evaluation of the credibility and sincerity of the parties
involved. Spence-Burke v. Burke, 140 AD3d 1124 (2d Dept. 2017).
The Court has attempted to summarize the sum and substance of the
testimony of the witnesses as is more fully set forth herein. In
addition, when necessary and throughout this Decision and Order, the
Court herein quotes the salient portions of the testimony that it
highlights which the Court finds relevant to its determination.
A. Mother's Case:
MA:
Direct Examination
MA (hereinafter referred to Mr. A") testified generally as to his
relationship with the Mother, his children, his employment, his home,
and the G children. He lives in Silver Spring, Maryland, where he has
lived for approximately eleven (11) years. He married the Mother on
xxxx, 2022. This is his second marriage, with his first marriage ending
in divorce. He has two children from his first marriage, L and Y. He
sees his children approximately forty (40%) percent of the time, seeing
them on Wednesday and Thursday in one week, and Thursday through Sunday
the following week. He is employed as a data engineer for XXXX earning
approximately $185,000.00 per year. He has spent time with the G
children, generally over the Jewish Sabbath, the Jewish holidays, and
when they come home from school. The G children and Mr. A learn the
Torah together, talk and converse,"hang out", and go to dinner. He has a
five (5) bedroom single family home with a safe yard and where all of
the children have rooms.
Cross-Examination — Father's Counsel
Mr. A and the Mother were "matched" through a friend, which he
classified as "Jewish dating". He was aware that the Mother lived in New
York when they first met. He became engaged to the Mother approximately
three (3) months after they met. Mr. A was concerned that the Mother
lived in New York while he lived in Maryland. Mr. A could not relocate
due to the nature of his employment, his attachment to Maryland and it
would create issues with him seeing his own children. The Mother is with
Mr. A when the G children are with the Father. During this time, the
Mother sees Mr. A's children. The G children generally do not travel
back and forth from New York to Maryland (and vice-versa). The G
children refer to him as "abba"; this means "Father" in Hebrew.
Cross-Examination — AFC
If the G children are permitted to relocate to Maryland, SN and SS
will sleep in one bedroom, and CS and L will sleep in another bedroom. Y
will have his own bedroom. He is willing to repopulate rooms to make
all of the children happy. The G children refer to him as "abba".
Additionally, the G children call the Father's wife "emma", which is
"Mother" in Hebrew.
Re-Direct Examination
Mr. A works on a "hybrid" basis: he predominantly works remotely from
his home, but he is in the office once every two weeks. He considered
himself "ultra" orthodox. His children interact with the G children. For
instance, when the G children spent seven (7) days in Maryland, last
summer, he saw all of the children interact. They presented as calm and
pleasant, and he described the interaction as "good". He did not observe
any "clashing" between his children and the G children.
Re-Cross Examination — Defendant's Counsel
Mr. A understood during the period in which he dated the Mother that
she may or may not be permitted to relocate. He spends approximately
eighteen (18) days per month together with the Mother.
SG:
Direct Examination
The Mother testified as to some background information. She was
married to the Father for approximately thirteen (13) years and they
have three (3) children together. Their divorce action was settled with
the assistance of a mediator, and the parties executed the Stipulation
and were subsequently divorced by the Judgment. The parties agreed in
the Stipulation that the children would live with her, and that the
Father would have parenting time every other weekend from Friday (timed
to Sabbath) through Sunday at 5:00 p.m. The Father was also to return
the children to the Mother one-hour before school starts. The Father
also had additional parenting time every Thursday for dinner. The
parties also agreed to alternate Jewish holidays. At the time that the
parties executed the Stipulation, the Mother lived in Inwood, New York,
and the Father was living with his parents in Hewlett, New York. The
Mother remained in Inwood — which was the location of the "marital
residence" — for approximately one (1) year after the Stipulation was
signed. After that, the Mother relocated out of Inwood. She is employed
as the Chief Compliance Officer at XXXX. She earns anywhere from
$120,000 to $150,000 per annum. Her income now is more than at the time
of the Stipulation. At the time of the execution of the Stipulation, the
Father was not employed.
The Mother testified as to the Father's use of Adderall. In or around
August of 2019, the Father entered into drug rehabilitation. The
Husband had overdosed on Adderall and the Mother asked him to attend
rehabilitation. When the parties would attend "couples therapy"
sessions, the Father would arrive "high". The parties discussed the
Father's drug use prior to the execution of the Stipulation. The Father —
in the Stipulation — agreed to monthly drug testing for a period of two
(2) years. The Husband spent the better part of a decade addicted to
Adderall. The Mother wanted the children to be protected and did not
believe that it was okay for the children to live in a house where a
parent was using drugs. The Mother can compel the Father to submit to
random drug testing, and the Father is to inform the Mother if he fails a
test. While the Mother received clean test results from the Father
after September 26, 2019, in November of 2020, the Mother learned of new
Adderall use by the Father from a Rabbi. She described feeling like a
"deer in headlights". The Mother was concerned about the Father
overdosing. The Mother then made an application to the Court seeking
drug testing, and a hair follicle test was ordered.
The Mother testified about the schooling of the children. SN attends
an Orthodox school and is in the eighth grade. SS attends the same
school and is in fourth grade. CS attends a different Orthodox school
and is in third grade. The Father is aware of where all of the children
attend school. There are no after school activities. SN arrives at
school at 7:05 a.m. and is home by 5:30 p.m. SS starts school at 8:30
a.m., which ends around 4:20 p.m. CS attends school from 8:30 a.m.
through 4:00 p.m.
The Mother testified as to the extracurricular activities of their
children as well as their socialization. SN participates in guitar
lessons once per week. CS will likely start taking swimming lessons
again. SN has no close friends. SS has no close friends. CS is
struggling as she has no close friends.
The Mother testified as to her arrangement with Mr. A and her desire
to relocate to Maryland. When the Mother has her custodial time with the
children, Mr. A travels to New York prior to the Sabbath, and then
leaves on Tuesdays. On the weekends in which the Father has parenting
time with the children, the Mother takes the children to the Father's
home and then travels to Maryland to be with Mr. A. The Mother then
leaves Maryland on Sundays at noon and picks-up the G children by 6:00
p.m. The result is that Mother and Mr. A will not see each other until
the next Friday.
The Mother testified regarding her desire to relocate to Maryland and
the Father's parental access if she is permitted to relocate. The
Mother described her relationship with Mr. A as being a married couple
when they are together, but when they are not together, it is as if she
is a single mother. The G children are always asking for Mr. A. She
effectively testified that the Father's parental access need not change.
SN was accepted to an Orthodox boarding school (with a dormitory)
located in Baltimore, Maryland. This school starts at 7:30 a.m. and
concludes at 4:00 p.m. After SN eats dinner, he returns to school until
9:00 p.m. This school permits family member access on the Sabbath. If
she lived locally (meaning in Maryland), she would be able to see SN at
the school somewhat regularly. The Father currently has alternating
weekend parental access with the children, and that could continue. On
one weekend, the Mother would drive the children to New York (every
fourth week), and on the other weekend, the Father can travel to
Maryland to have access with SS and CS and also see SN at the boarding
school. The Mother is willing to assume the cost of gas or reasonable
flight expenses for the Father if he travels to Maryland. The Mother is
willing to do what it takes and what is necessary to facilitate the
Father's lodging. While the Father is supposed to have parenting time on
Thursdays from 5:30 p.m. to 7:00 p.m., to make this up to the Father,
she is willing to give the Father an entire week at the beginning of
each summer.
The Mother testified as to SS's and CS's proposed education in
Maryland. The school in Maryland is more inclusive and "sweeter" for CS.
SS would attend the same school, which has more educational resources
than the school in New York. SS currently has an IEP. The Mother met
with the Principal of the school in Maryland, told the Principal of SS's
educational needs, and she formed a belief that there are resources at
this school that will enable him to be successful. The school — has a
fifteen-to-one student-teacher ratio, whereas the current school's
parent-teacher ratio here in New York is twenty or twenty-five-to-one.
The Mother believes that the smaller student-teacher ratio will be
beneficial for SS.
The Mother testified regarding the religious upbringing of the
children. An issue arose about adherence to Jewish Law, and one
philosophy is insulating the children from technology. For instance, the
children are not exposed to PG movies and the children are in a school
where they are not exposed to secular movies. There is no access to
Netflix in the Mother's home for the children. However, the children
have access to Netflix in the Father's home. A dispute also arose
regarding whether or not the children should watch a PG-13 movie. The
proposed relocation to Maryland will enhance the religious upbringing of
the children as the schools in Maryland are strong with a good
"mind-set". There is less "materialism" in Maryland then there is in New
York. The children are taken to an "unsuitable" Synagogue by the Father
in the Five Towns, and it is "unsuitable" because the men there were
not necessarily ultra orthodox. Jewish men are supposed to pray three
times per week in a Minyan, but the Father does not take SN to do this.
The Mother testified about the economic benefits of relocating to
Maryland. The cost of living in Maryland is cheaper than here in the
"five towns". It is less pretentious in Maryland. The Mother keeps a
Glatt Kosher kitchen. Mr. A also keeps a Glatt kosher kitchen, so, in
Maryland, this will continue. The Mother currently receives $750.00 per
month in child support from the Father. The parties' Stipulation
required the Father to pay $900.00 per month for the first three years
and $1,100.00 per month thereafter. The Mother is only receiving $750.00
per month, but the Father unilaterally deducts what is owed in
equitable distribution from the Mother to him from his child support
obligation. The Mother has not had an increase in child support. There
is supposed to be additional support in the form of tuition, camp, child
care, tutoring, and extracurricular activities. There have been issues,
however, with the Father reimbursing the Mother for some of these
expenses. For instance, the Father said that he would pay for guitar
lessons, and while he paid a few times, he ceased paying. The Father did
not pay 50% of the Yeshiva for 2019 through 2020. This also occurred
for the 2020-2021 school year. The parties are to share camp expenses on
a "50/50" basis, but the Mother has been fully responsible for same.
The Mother paid and was reimbursed for year 2022, but not for year 2021.
The Mother pays for tutoring expenses for SN. CS began seeing a
therapist in January, 2021, but the Mother has not received any
reimbursement from the Father for this.
The Mother testified about why a proposed relocation to Maryland is
in the best interests of the children in her opinion. SN will attend
school there, and the two other children, who look up to him, want to
stay near him. The Mother also believes that it behooves SN to have her
living nearby. CS needs a new social situation, and Maryland is affords
her new beginnings. SS loves the wooded area there, and the new school
environment will give him more attention.
The Mother testified regarding certain disagreements with the Father.
A woman by the name of Dina Leff (hereinafter referred to as "Ms.
Leff") has counseled SN and SS since the divorce. The school provided SN
and SS with Ms. Leff as a counselor, and she helped the boys through
the parties' divorce. The Father wanted Ms. Leff to tell him what the
boys said during counseling sessions and, then the Father refused Ms.
Leff's services for the boys. While court intervention resolved the
issue, the two boys went without a therapist for a few weeks because of
the Father's objections. The parties had another disagreement over a
medical issue. SS is allergic to dogs and cats, but a cat was brought to
the Father's parent's house, which was where the Father lived at the
time. The middle child was returned to the Mother with rashes and was
treated by the pediatrician. The cat was then given away to another
family member.
Cross Examination — Father's Counsel
The Mother initially found out about the Father taking Adderall again
in November of 2020. The Mother could not recall if there were concerns
about the Father's drug use from the date of the Stipulation through
November of 2020. Prior to the filing of her application in May of 2021,
the Mother stopped the Father's parenting time, but she was unsure when
the stoppage occurred. The Mother could not recall if there were any
concerns about the Father's behavior from November of 2020 through May
of 2021. When the Mother found out that the Father was taking Adderall
again, she acted to protect the children. She could not recall, however,
when the Father's parenting time regularly ceased. The Mother learned
that the children were introduced to B C (hereinafter referred to as
"Ms. C") when a friend sent the Mother an invite for an engagement party
of the Father and Ms. C. At that time, the Father still had some
parenting time with the children.
The Father complied with the order of the court for drug testing
issued in or around May 19, 2021. While the Mother could not recall
whether or not the drug screens were positive or negative, the drug
screening results from May 26, 2021 were negative; as were his two
subsequent drug screens after the filing of the Mother's application.[3]
While the Father had three (3) negative drug test results after the
filing of the Mother's application, the Father chose to restrict or
limit his own parenting time and see the children in his car. The Mother
did not impose this upon the Father. Nonetheless, the Mother did want
the Father's parenting time supervised because the Stipulation provided
for it. It was the Mother's belief that "substance abuse" means the use
of drugs or substances for which the Father went into rehabilitation
for. The Mother believed that the Father was still using Adderall after
June of 2021. The Mother could not recall whether or not the Father
requested access with the children for June 18, 2021 and June 19, 2021.
She likewise could not recall whether or not the temporary orders of the
Court permitted the Father's new wife, Ms. C, to be the supervisor.
The Mother moved to Far Rockaway in December of 2020 with the
children, but she could not recall if she discussed moving with the
Father prior to the move. The Mother acknowledged that the Stipulation
provides for joint legal custody of the children and that, in sum and
substance, the parties were to discuss all major decisions concerning
the health, education and welfare of the children. The Mother could not
recall if she gave the Father her new residence address or land line
telephone number.
While the children have been seeing Ms. Leff since the divorce, the
Mother, could not recall if she signed an authorization to allow the
children to see Ms. Leff nor could she recall whether or not she
discussed the children seeing Ms. Leff with the Father. The Mother could
not recall if the Father had asked her if the children were seeing a
medical provider, such as, for example Ms. Leff. If the children are
permitted to relocate, they can still see Ms. Leff on a virtual basis.
The Mother did not recall if she told the Father that the children would
be treated by Ms. Leff.
The Mother could not recall if she allowed the children to go to the
Father for Shavuot in 2021 even though he was supposed to have this
holiday in odd years. However, she acknowledged that the parties' so
ordered Stipulation of June 8, 2022 provides that the Father would have
the children in 2024 to make-up for 2021. The Mother acknowledged that
the Father also saw the two boys over Shavuot in 2022 for an overnight
visit.
The Mother withdrew her request for sole custody and sole decision-making without prejudice.
The Mother could not recall if she told the Father about phone
meetings relative to SS's IEP. While the Father asked the Mother for a
copy of SS's IEP, the Mother could not recall if she ever sent a copy of
it to the Father. SN had issues with gas and constipation, and the
Mother took the child to a doctor for same, but she could not recall if
she notified the Father of same. The Mother acknowledged that the
Stipulation addresses notice of professional appointments. The Mother
acknowledged taking the children to second doctor and the Mother
acknowledged not providing the Father a "heads up" with respect to same.
SS had a neuropsychological evaluation as directed by the Board of
Education this past school year, but the Mother could not recall whether
or not she advised the Father about this evaluation. The Mother took SS
to the neuro-psychologist three (3) times, but the Mother could not
recall if she told the Father about any of the three (3) visits to the
neuro-psychologist.
The Mother filled out the application for SN to attend the high
school in Baltimore. The Mother could not recall if she notified the
Father about submitting SN's application to the boarding school. The
Mother could not recall listing the Father as the "Father" on the
application to the boarding school, and she could not recall whether or
not she provided the Father's email address or his phone number on that
application. The Mother acknowledged that the application listed Mr. A
as the step-father and listed the Father as the Father, but acknowledged
that the application did not indicate that the Father receive
correspondence. The application did not list the Father's phone number
or email address, and the Mother could not additionally recall if she
notified the Father of this application after she submitted it. To date,
the Mother acknowledged that she and the Father have not discussed
sending SN to The boarding school. The Mother acknowledged Mr. A drove
SN to the interview at The boarding school, and the Mother acknowledged
that she did not tell the Father that SN was going to the interview. The
Mother likewise acknowledged that she did not offer to the Father the
opportunity to take SN to the interview. SN actually interviewed at four
(4) different schools, but the Mother could not recall whether or not
she told the Father about any of the four interviews. SN was accepted
into The boarding school. The Mother enrolled SN in The boarding school,
but acknowledged not consulting with the Father prior to enrolling him.
While the Mother acknowledged that the parties are to consult on major
decisions, she was under the assumption that the Father knew everything
that was going on.
Even if the Mother is granted permission to relocate, she
acknowledged that she will keep the same job. The Mother acknowledged
not having informed the Father of her engagement to Mr. A at the time of
the engagement. While the Mother testified that if she is permitted to
relocate, the Father could maintain, generally, the same access schedule
that he currently has with the children, she acknowledged that it is
"highly impossible" to continue the Thursday dinner visits. While the
Father previously asked for a Thursday overnight with the children, she
could not recall if she "allowed" it. The Mother nonetheless
acknowledged that she wanted the children to have a healthy relationship
with the Father. In the past year, the Mother acknowledged having taken
the children out of school early to drive to Maryland, and agreed that
it is important for both parents to know where the children are in the
case of an emergency. The Mother, however, could not recall whether or
not she traveled to Maryland without telling the Father. The Mother is
aware that the Father is seeking more parenting time. She is unsure as
to whether or not the current schedule is "a lot" of parenting time for
the Father. When the children are with the Father, there is a lot of
"video time", and the Father does not spend much time with the children.
There was an oral Stipulation placed on the Record during the Hearing
that the Father is current in his basic child support obligation to the
Mother.
The Mother acknowledged that the G children have only been with her
stepchildren (Mr. A's children) a "handful" of times. The Mother
acknowledged that if she is not allowed to relocate to Maryland, she
will not move to Maryland.
Cross Examination — AFC
The Mother would make the decisions for the children prior to the
dissolution of the parties' marriage. She described herself as the
"main" parent for the children. The Father gave the Mother "full
latitude", knowing that the Mother wanted what is best for these
children. The Mother always chose the schools for the children, and the
Father never provided alternatives to the schools chosen by the Mother.
The Mother selected the pediatrician and the dentist for the children,
and the Father was never unhappy with the Mother's choice. To the
Mother, her agreement to joint custody was simply her agreement to
"boilerplate" agreement, as the Father was not in a good place at the
time. The Father had just gone to rehabilitation for drug use. While the
Father is very loving to the children, he is not necessarily a
"present" parent and was not "hands on". There were times, after the
separation of the parties, that the Father would decline parenting time.
The Father did not attend any IEP or CSE meetings for SS, and the
Father would leave the child's educational decisions in the hands of the
Mother.
The Mother did not want the Father to have parenting time with the
children unsupervised. The Mother opposed using the Father's parents as
supervisors, as they knew about his drug use and would, effectively, do
nothing. The Mother petitioned this Court for a modification of the
Father's parenting time. The Father, prior to the Mother interposing her
application, did not seek any modifications with respect to his
parenting time. When the Father's drug test results came back
"positive", unsupervised visits stopped. The Father was addicted to
Adderall and other drugs, and when he would take too much, he would not
sleep for nights. The Father would exhibit anger, jitters and suffer
from mood instability.
The Mother informs the Father beforehand when she takes the children
to the doctor. While the Father just recently went with the Mother to
SS's colonoscopy appointment (just prior to the litigation), the Father
never historically attended doctor appointments for the children. The
Father never complained about the children's participation in
extracurricular activities. The Father never asked the Mother about the
children; he only did so, to some degree, after this litigation started.
The Mother did not provide the Father's contact information on the
application for SN to The boarding school because the application was
only for the interview. The Mother simply "checked" the boxes.
When the children are with the Father, they spend time on watching
videos and spend time with their grandmother. While the Mother has not
discussed relocation to Maryland with the children, SS has asked the
Mother to move to Maryland. SS is aware that Mr. A and his
children/step-siblings live in Maryland. If the Mother is allowed to
relocate to Maryland, she wants to know what the Father wants for
"make-up" time. She wants these children to have a healthy relationship
with and to be connected to their Father. If the children attend summer
camp in New York, she is willing to make it up to the Father with
additional time in the summer months.
Re-Direct Examination
The Father never told the Mother directly that he was engaged to Ms.
C. From January, 2020 to the present, the Father would take the children
to Teaneck, New Jersey without telling the Mother. The Father would
stay overnight without notifying the Mother. When the Father requested
an overnight with the children in April of 2023, the Mother declined,
citing concerns of the Father's mental health and the children "changed
their stories" over where the Father was. The Mother therefore had
concerns about the Father overdosing and using Adderall again. The
Father has previously lied about his substance abuse. The Father did not
seek to enforce unsupervised access with the children prior to the
Mother starting the instant post-judgment proceedings. For the five
months prior thereto, the Father accepted supervised access.
The children began attending summer camp at the age of three (3)
years. The Father never selected the camp nor, did he object to any
camps chosen by the Mother.
The Father recently missed two Thursday visits with the children and
did not ask to reschedule those visits. While the Father has parenting
time on Thursday of each week, that visit is only ninety (90) minutes in
duration per visit. This equates to approximately three (3) total days
of parenting time. The Mother is prepared to add an additional seven (7)
days to the Father's parenting time per year in the summer if she is
permitted to relocate.
Re-Cross Examination — Father's Counsel
The Mother believed that it was "fruitless" to discuss certain things
with the Father, as the Father was untruthful with her. Nonetheless,
the Mother acknowledged that when the Mother brought a concern to the
Father about the children watching a certain movie, the children did not
watch the movie. The Mother was unsure as to how she would feel if she
only got to see her children every two weeks and not during the week.
Re-Cross Examination — AFC
If the Father were to travel to Maryland one per week, he can visit
with the children on Thursdays, and even on Tuesdays, if the Father
wants it.
B. Father's Case:
Anasuya Delgado:
Direct Examination
Anasuya Delgado (hereinafter referred to as "Ms. Delgado") testified
as to background information and her assigned task. She is employed at
Kids in Common (hereinafter referred to as "KIC"). She conducts
supervised visititation sessions and co-parenting sessions with the
parties. These began in May, 2022. All of the sessions were conducted
virtually. The parties discussed co-parenting and co-parenting styles.
She observed the Mother to be receptive to the "materials" with little
feedback.
Ms. Delgado testified about the Mother. The Mother was disengaged for
a majority of the sessions, was busy typing on her phone and
communicating with others, as compared to the Father, who was very
engaged. The Mother would leave sessions early.
Ms. Delgado testified about the Mother's desire to relocate. The
Mother read a letter about her desire to relocate. While the Father was
"receptive" to listening, he was not willing to allow the relocation.
The Father would not even consider dating anyone who lived far away.
Cross Examination — Mother's Counsel
Ms. Delgado generated only one report. The witness was told to
generate the report by her direct supervisor, Meg Sayers. While the
witness testified that KIC received a request from the Court to provide
services, she has not seen any actual orders, nor was she aware of the
terms of the parties' Judgment.
While the Mother was observed to be typing during some sessions with
Ms. Delgado, she was unsure if the Mother was typing notes. The Father
was identified at intake as presenting a problem of not being able to
discuss parenting issues with the Mother, issues with parenting time,
and not being privy to many things. The Father did not say that there
was any objection to any of the activities of the children or any of the
medical decisions which were made.
Other than the sessions with the parties, the witness was unsure if
the parties ever implemented the guidance given at the sessions.
Cross Examination — AFC
Ms. Delgado described the Mother has making minimal eye contact and
that the Mother spent most of her time on the phone typing, and she
therefore concluded that the Mother was not receptive. While Ms. Delgado
has administered co-parenting work for seventeen years, and while she
claimed she had experience, she acknowledged that she did not receive
any training by any experts. Ms. Delgado acknowledged that she has
received no training programs since college.
Re-Direct Examination
While Ms. Delgado was not familiar with the Court order assigning
KIC, she provided services consistent with the terms of the order. Ms.
Delgado reiterated that the Mother was on her phone typing during the
sessions. Ms. Delgado noticed that the Mother would be disengaged
sporadically for quick moments every session. Ms. Delgado reiterated
that the Father was receptive to the conversation about the relocation,
but only to the conversation, and he was not receptive about the Mother
actually relocating.
Re-Cross Examination — Mother's Counsel
While Ms. Delgado has performed parent-coordination work for
approximately seventeen (17) years, she has maybe worked with only five
(5) families that are ultra-orthodox. Ms. Delgado did not discuss Jewish
law.
Re-Cross Examination — AFC
Ms. Delgado is not fully aware of the parameters of the Judgment with
respect to following of Jewish law, and Ms. Delgado was unaware of
certain restrictions.
B C:
Direct Examination
Ms. C testified as to background information. She is the Father's
current wife who met the Father in January, 2021 and married him on June
20, 2021. Ms. C has a son and daughter. Those children principally live
with her. She is employed as a Family Nurse Practitioner.
Ms. C testified as to her involvement with the Father and the G
children. She maintains contact with the G children. At home, she, the
Father, and all of the children get together as a family. She cooks for
Shabbos. Ms. C is Tznivs and she covers her hair. There is only Kosher
food and dishes in the home. Everyone is Kosher observant. Since all of
the children enjoy different foods, she makes different food for all of
the children. During Shabbos, they all bond by eating, playing board
games, playing basketball and reading. She has observed the Father
taking walks with the children. The Father reads and plays with the
children. She engages in activities with the G children, and she feels
bonded to them.
Ms. C testified about the interactions of the children. All of the
children act like siblings around one another. The children hangout
together, and have spent alternate weekends together for the past two
years. The children spend birthday celebrations together. Last summer,
all of the children went to the Poconos together for a week. They all
had fun tubing and hiking.
Ms. C testified as to her knowledge of the Father's Adderall usage.
While the Father may be taking Adderall, she has had no reason for
concern nor concern for any of the children.
Cross Examination — Mother's Counsel
The G children refer to Ms. C as "emma", which is "mother" in Hebrew.
She works 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday, and 8:30 a.m.
to 1:00 p.m. on Fridays. The Father is self-employed and makes his own
schedule.
MG:
Direct Examination
The Father testified as to some background information of the
parties. They separated in or around the Spring/Summer of 2018. The
Father moved out in stages. While he returned for a short time, there
was no improvement. The Father admitted to overusing Adderall prior to
the separation of the parties, and he used it off and on for about seven
(7) years. The Father never overused alcohol or marijuana. When the
parties were living together, the Father described the family as a
"close family unit".
The Father described and summarized his relationship with the
children. He described his relationship with SN as being "very involved"
and that they were "physically and emotionally" close. He is very
involved in SN's schooling, as he always knew that both boys would
attend a particular school. The Father, therefore, never felt the need
to offer an alternative school for the boys. The Father was involved in
the procedure to procure the IEP for SS. For CS's schooling, there was
school that the Mother preferred and "pushed for", even though the
Father thought another school was more viable. Ultimately, CS was
accepted into this school due to the Mother's tenacity.
The Father testified as to his involvement in the medical care of the
children. He estimated that, for doctor "well visits" and when the
children were sick, he would take the children to the doctor around
twenty (20%) percent of the time. He worked a distance from the home, he
was gone in the morning early and he came home late from work. The
Father took SS to his colonoscopy appointments.
The Father testified as to his entrance into rehabilitation. He
entered a drug rehabilitation program in July of 2019. His separation
from his family caused a tremendous amount of questioning about his
life. He described being in a lot of pain. He began drinking alcohol and
utilizing marijuana. He enrolled himself in a six-week program. Six
months prior to his admission, he saw the children while he was living
with his parents. The children were driven to his visits by the Mother.
The Father testified about drug testing. The Stipulation does not
restrict him from utilizing Adderall, but it does have a drug testing
provision. The Father was not using Adderall at the time of the
Stipulation, but he started utilizing it in or about November of 2020.
From the date of the Stipulation, the Father participated in drug
testing at clinics. The results of the first two tests were sent to the
Mother, but there is nothing in the Stipulation that requires the
results be sent to the Mother. In or about November, 2020, the results
of a drug test were positive for Amphetamines. The Father was taking
regular drug tests, but there were positive test results due to the use
of Adderall. The Father did not classify this as "substance abuse"
because Adderall is not an illegal substance. The Father only took
Adderall in accordance with the prescription provided to him. His
visitation with the children never should have been supervised because
his Adderall was prescribed by his treating health care provider.
The Father testified about his parenting time. His contact became
limited to phone calls with the children. Then, the Father elected to
see the children in a car in front of the house. It was his decision to
see the children in a car, because, in his opinion, it was better than
seeing the children with a supervisor present. The Father provided
letters to the Mother from the clinician who prescribed the Adderall,
but the Mother refused to accept those letters. The Father was supposed
to have the children for the Passover holiday in 2021 pursuant to the
Stipulation, but this parental access was denied by the Mother.
The Father testified about the months from March, 2021 through May,
2021. He had hoped to resolve the issues without the necessity of court
intervention. Prior to the Mother seeking court intervention, the Father
would see the children in his car approximately two times per week in
front of the home. Upon the court ordering drug tests in May of 2021,
the Father tested every month and all tests came back negative.
The Father testified surrounding parenting time during the Auf Ruf
weekend (the celebration of his engagement). He was to have regular
parenting time with the children on this weekend. The Mother refused.
This weekend was special to him. The children attended the Auf Ruf, but
they were supervised. The children also attended the Father's wedding.
The Father asked the Mother if the children could be there unsupervised,
but the Mother did not agree. He needed a court order, and the children
were ultimately produced.
The Father spoke about his continued Adderall use. He acknowledged
that he continues to take Adderall as prescribed. The Father denies
having any substance abuse issues.
The Father testified about religion. He describes himself as Jewish
Orthodox. During their marriage, the parties were strictly Kosher in the
home and their food only came from approved places. When the parties
were married, both were observant. At his current home, he observes the
highest level of Kosher. The Father has a smart television at home, and
he can use it watching "apps" like Netflix. The parties' Stipulation
does not contain any restrictions on the use of videos, movies or
television. However, the school rules must be followed. There is a
typical Shabbos at the Father's home when he has the children. The boys
and the Father go to evening prayers. His step-son sometimes accompanies
them. When they return home, the Father blesses the children, they have
a festive dinner, and they talk. On Fridays and Saturdays, there is a
lot of "game playing", such as board games and basketball. The Father
spends one-on-one time with each child on Thursday and on weekends which
he characterizes as "special time" so to enable him to talk in-depth
with that child. Each child's birthday is important to the Father, as a
theme is selected and the entire family is invited. The Jewish holiday
of Shavuot is important to the Father as he can uphold the tradition of
learning prayers. The Father is supposed to have this holiday with the
children every "odd year" in accordance with the Stipulation. The Father
was supposed to have the children in 2021, but the Mother denied him
the right to see the children. In 2022, which was the Mother's year, the
Father walked from Woodmere to East Rockaway (which is an
hour-and-a-half walk each way) to see the boys and learn with them
overnight.
The Father testified about his parenting time. In the last two years,
a majority of his parenting time with the children is at his home in
Woodmere. The Father's step-son and step-daughter are present, and they
are present when the G children visit him. He describes the relationship
as "very close" and that they are "bonded" together. At times, the G
children play well with his step-children, and, at other times, they are
"at odds". They all go on family trips, such as to amusement parts, on
hikes, and they play miniature golf. He describes his children as having
a loving relationship with Ms. C and their step-siblings. In fact, when
he speaks to the children during their time with the Mother, the
children frequently speak with Ms. C. The Father's parents reside in
Hewlett, which is a one minute drive from his residence. He describes
his parents as extremely close to the children, and he uses his parents
as babysitters for the children if needed. In fact, his father used to
take the children off the bus when the parties lived together.
The Father testified about the children's education and his
involvement. He attends parent-teacher conferences each year for each
child. The Father became aware in April of 2023 that SN applied to The
boarding school in Maryland, and only after the chid had already visited
the school. The first parent listed on this application was the Mother
and the second parent listed on the application was the Mother's current
husband, Mr. A. The Father had to call the school to get a copy of the
application. On the other hand, the Father applied to a high school for
SN in Far Rockaway and listed the Mother's name and contact information
on that application. The Father preferred a local high school, as he
could not imagine SN going away in ninth grade. However, SN wanted to go
away, as the child told him so. The Father learned of the interview at
The boarding school only after the interview took place. When the Father
asked the Mother why she did not tell him, the Mother indicated that
she thought he already knew. If the Father had known about SN's
interview, the Father would have taken him to the interview.
The Father testified about his attempts at extra parenting time. In
the past two years, the Father has asked the Mother for extra parenting
time with the children. He has asked approximately ten times, and the
Mother has refused, generally on all occasions. The Mother never lets
the children stay beyond the time frame for his Thursday dinner. The
Father asked the Mother for Thursday overnights, but she did not agree.
The Father testified about his Thursday parenting time. He places
great value on his Thursday night parenting time with the children. He
considers it to be his "anchor", as it is the only time he can sit down
and talk with and hug his children. It is his opinion that virtual
visits with the children are not a substitute for in-person contact, as
he learns more about the children when they are physically with him.
The Father testified about his reasons for opposing the Mother's
request to relocate. He currently resides in the Five Towns, which is
where the children were born and raised. The children attend specific
Synagogues in the Five Towns. The Rabbis at the Synagogues, and the
people at the Synagogues, all know the children. The travel time between
the Father's residence and the Mother's current residence is
approximately ten to fifteen minutes. If the Mother relocated to
Maryland, the travel time is approximately five hours. If the Mother was
permitted to relocate to Maryland, SS and CS would have to miss part of
school on Friday and Sunday to visit him in New York. Friday and Sunday
schooling is of great importance to the Father, and missing school will
cause stress to be put onto those children. The proposed move will
disrupt consistency. Both SS and CS do not have any friends in Maryland.
The Father believes that the proposed relocation would be unfair to the
kids, as it would require them to be uprooted.
The Father testified about co-parenting with the Mother. Over the
past two years, co-parenting with the Mother has been very difficult, if
not impossible. The Father often does not know about the health or
education of the children until "after the fact". He has no sense that
the Mother wishes to co-parent with him.
The Father testified about what relief he seeks. He seeks a shared
access schedule with the children or, at a minimum, to extend Thursdays
to overnights. On the alternating weekends in which he has the children,
he wants parenting time to begin on Thursday night through Monday
morning, and he would take the children to school.
Cross Examination — Mother's Counsel
The Father acknowledged that he submitted an application for SN to
attend the Munsey school, in Rockland County, New York, which is two
hours away. SN, however, was not accepted into the Munsey school. The
Father acknowledged that SN was accepted into The boarding school and
that the child was very excited about this. While the Father testified
that Baltimore, Maryland, is an unsafe city, he acknowledged never
having seen the proposed school and that he has never seen the city of
Baltimore. Likewise, the Father did no independent research about the
city, except for information he obtained within the last month. The
Father acknowledged that during these proceedings, he has not approached
the Mother to discuss any educational issues with respect to their
children. The Father acknowledged that he has no objection to SN
attending The boarding school. While the Father testified about the
duration of travel time from his current residence to Maryland by bus,
train and car, the Father did not consider travel time by airplane.
The Father acknowledged that there is a lot of interaction during
audio calls with the children, and this could continue if the Mother was
permitted to relocate to Maryland. The Father acknowledged being
self-employed as a psychotherapist and that 90% of his "practice" is
tele-health. When the parties were married, because of the Father's
employment and travel attendant thereto, he acknowledged that the Mother
would take care of the "day to day" stuff for the children. The Father
acknowledged that the Mother had no family in New York and that she
moved to New York to marry him.
If the Mother was permitted to relocate to Maryland, the Father would
feel deprived of the ability to "stop by" to see the children. However,
the Father acknowledged that he generally does not currently just
"stop-by" currently. While the Father is concerned about the children
missing school due to Shabbos if the Mother was permitted to relocate to
Maryland, if the Mother brought the children to New York if she were
permitted to relocate, the children would only miss a portion of school
once per month. The Father acknowledged that when the children get sick
on occasion, they, in fact, miss school
The Father acknowledged that if the Mother was permitted to relocate
to Maryland, nothing prevents him from calling the schools or speaking
to the teachers if the children went to school in Maryland. The Father
acknowledged that he has not yet called the school in Maryland. The
Father acknowledged that in years 2019 and 2020, he never filed an
application with the Court alleging that the Mother is not complying
with the parental access provisions of the Stipulation.
Cross Examination — AFC
The Father acknowledged that the Mother was the primary person to
take the children to doctor and to take the children to dental
appointments since their physical separation. The Father acknowledged
that the Mother is the primary parent who gets the children up in the
morning. The Father acknowledged that he trusted that the Mother was
taking the children to their annual physical examinations.
Even if the Father learned that the children wanted to relocate to
Maryland with the Mother, he would still oppose the proposed relocation,
as he trusts his own assessments rather than the assessments of his
children. The Father would not trade his hour-and-a-half parenting time
on Thursdays for more time on an overall basis. The Father acknowledged
that the children spend a majority of the time with the Mother.
Re-Direct Examination
The Father felt that there was a school in Far Rockaway which was the
best local school for SN, and the Father advised the Mother that he was
filling out an application for the child's attendance in this school.
The Mother does not directly pick-up the phone when the Father calls;
rather, the Mother simply puts the children on the phone right away.
When the parties see each other in person, the Mother looks past him and
"waives him off". The parties and the children have lived in the same
community for the last seventeen (17) to eighteen (18) years. The Father
reiterated that he has attended parent-teacher conferences for each
child for the last four (4) years, and that he attends these conferences
without the Mother.
The Father reiterated that if the children relocate to Maryland, they
must miss Sunday school and Friday for half of the year. The Mother's
proposal of paying for one weekend in Baltimore for the Father to visit
with the children is not sustainable in his opinion as he would go with
his entire family (including Ms. C and her children), and his
step-children may have to miss school. The Father underscored that the
children rarely miss school due to illness. The Father denied begining
learning in school with one of the children just because of the Mother's
relocation application; rather, he did so to help the child and to
spend more time with the child.
The children's opinion regarding relocation is important to know, but
their opinion is not a substitute for his own opinions and judgment.
The Father reiterated that he put the Mother's name on a local Yeshiva
application, while the Mother did not put his name down for the
application to The boarding school. The Father finds that The boarding
school is far away, and objects to the proposed relocation inasmuch as
five (5) hours of travel time is a long way to travel. The Father
reiterated that while he is ambivalent about The boarding school, SN is
excited about it and he will not object to SN attending same.
Re-Cross Examination — Mother's Counsel
The Father acknowledged that he has not called the pediatrician to
find out when the children's annual physicals exams were. The Father
acknowledged having the right to make those inquiries. The Father
acknowledged not having asked the Mother about the children's dental
appointments.
Re-Cross Examination — AFC
The Father acknowledged that the children were aware of the proposed
relocation before the Court vacated the order prohibiting them from
discussing it, as the Father told the children something along the lines
of "I don't want you moving so far away from me".
C. In-Camera
A separate in camera was held with each of the parties' children on July 21, 2023, pursuant to Lincoln v. Lincoln, 24 NY2d 270 (1969).
The Court met with each child individually and had a full opportunity
to hear from them. The Court has thoroughly considered the statements
made by the children and has afforded those statements the appropriate
weight having considered their ages and level of maturity.
DISCUSSION & ANALYSIS
RELOCATION TO MARYLAND
The only absolute in the law governing custody of children is that there are no absolutes. Friederwitzer v. Friederwitzer, 55 NY2d 89 (1982); McDermott v. Berolzheimer, 210 AD2d 559 (3d Dept. 1994).
Disputes involving custody and visitation are acknowledged to be among
the most difficult the courts are called upon to resolve, for they so
deeply affect the lives of children and the parents who love them. Daghir v. Daghir, 82 AD2d 191 (2d Dept. 1981). Courts must be vigilant to assure that children are fully protected and their best interests secured. Matter of Newton v. McFarlane, 174 AD3d 67 (2d Dept. 2019).
Each case presents a unique set of facts and thus a case-by-case
analysis is required to determine if the requisite showing has been made
to justify disrupting the relationship of the noncustodial parent and
the child. Bonfiglio v. Bonfiglio, 134 AD2d 426 (2d Dept. 1987).
Of course, as the Court of Appeals noted "... [a]ny court in
considering questions of child custody must make every effort to
determine what is for the best interest of the child, and what will best
promote its welfare and happiness..." Eschbach v. Eschbach, 56 NY2d 167 (1982).
There remains an unfortunate truth of a family that is the byproduct of
divorce: that family, once broken by divorce, cannot be put back
together in precisely the same way. Tropea v. Tropea, infra.
The Court takes the time to remind these parties that their children
are not chattel, and this Decision and Order is made with a view towards
what serves the best interests of the children (see generally H.K. v. R.C., 72 Misc 3d 909 (Supreme Court New York County 2021)), and not
the best interests of either parent. With those initial sentiments in
mind, this Court is called upon to determine whether or not the Mother
should be permitted to relocate with the children to another State.
The parties have an underlying Stipulation which contains provisions
regarding custody and parenting time of their children. Since the Mother
seeks to relocate to Maryland with the children, she, in effect, seeks a
modification of the Judgment. Modification of a court-approved
stipulation setting forth terms of custody or parental access is
permissible only upon a showing that there has been a change in
circumstances such that a modification is necessary to ensure the best
interests and welfare of the child. Assad v. Assad, 200 AD3d 831 (2d Dept. 2021); Greenberg v. Greenberg, 144 AD3d 625 (2d Dept. 2016). That change in circumstances should reflect a real need for change to ensure the best interests of the child. Matter of Cole v. Nofri, 107 AD3d 1510 (4th Dept. 2013) (Martoche, J., dissenting). The best interests of the child are determined by a review of the totality of the circumstances. Matter of Paige v. Paige, 202 AD3d 794 (2d Dept. 2022).
In considering the totality of the circumstances, the Court should
consider what is in furtherance of the child's welfare and happiness. See generally Matter of Bhanhattie H. v. Roxanne H., 56 Misc 3d 1040 (Family Court Queens County 2017).
A relocation is accepted as a change in circumstances, requiring the
parent seeking the move to demonstrate that relocating the children is
in their best interests. Matter of William V. v. Bridgett W., 182 AD3d 636 (3d Dept. 2020).
A parent seeking leave to relocate with a child bears the burden of
establishing by a preponderance of the evidence that the proposed move
would be in the child's best interests. Schwartz v. Schwartz, 186 AD3d 1742 (2d Dept. 2020); Matter of Hall v. Clas, 144 AD3d 801 (2d Dept. 2016); Matter of Bailey v. Ayoub, 203 AD3d 1043 (2d Dept. 2022).
The Court must consider each relocation request on its own merits with
due consideration of all the relevant facts and circumstances and with
predominant emphasis being placed on what outcome is most likely to
serve the best interests of the child. Matter of Louie v. Plissner, 174 AD3d 607 (2d Dept. 2019); Matter of Williams v. Jenkins, 167 AD3d 758 (2d Dept. 2018).
The seminal case concerning a parent's right to relocate with children is Tropea v. Tropea.
Decided by the Court of Appeals in 1996, it attempted to recognize the
juxtaposition of the interests of a custodial parent who wishes to move
away are pitted against those of a noncustodial parent who has a
powerful desire to maintain frequent and regular contact with the child.
Tropea v. Tropea, 87 NY2d 727 (1996). Tropea enumerated factors that courts considering relocation applications should consider:
Rather, we hold that, in all cases, the courts should be
free to consider and give appropriate weight to all of the factors that
may be relevant to the determination. These factors include, but are
certainly not limited to each parent's reasons for seeking or opposing
the move, the quality of the relationships between the child and the
custodial and noncustodial parents, the impact of the move on the
quantity and quality of the child's future contact with the noncustodial
parent, the degree to which the custodial parent's and child's life may
be enhanced economically, emotionally and educationally by the move,
and the feasibility of preserving the relationship between the
noncustodial parent and child through suitable visitation arrangements.
In the end, it is for the court to determine, based on all of the proof,
whether it has been established by a preponderance of the evidence that
a proposed relocation would serve the child's best interests.
Tropea, 87 AD2d 727 (1996). No one factor is determinative because the court must review the totality of the circumstances (see Matter of A.P. v. J.G.,
69 Misc 3d 1216(A) (Family Court Bronx County 2020)), and no factor
should be given such disproportionate weight as to predetermine the
outcome (see Matter of Caruso v. Cruz, 114 AD3d 769 (2d Dept. 2014)). The Court likewise must consider the position of the attorney of the children. Matter of Davis v. Ogden, 109 AD3d 539 (2d Dept. 2013).
Additionally, the impact of the move on the relationship between the
child and the noncustodial parent will remain a central concern. Matter of Caruso, 114 AD3d at 771. The Court has an obligation to make an objective and independent evaluation of the circumstances. Rizea v. Rizea, 218 AD3d 807 (2d Dept. 2023). Nonetheless, the rights and needs of the children must be accorded the greatest weight. Matter of Alaire K.G. v. Anthony P.G., 86 AD3d 216 (1st Dept. 2011).
Balanced against the aforesaid, the Court must also consider the
relationship between the children and the noncustodial parent, as the
Court must be concerned with the impact of the move on the relationship
between the child(ren) and the noncustodial parent, as it is
well-established that children derive an abundance of benefits from the
mature guiding hand and love of a second parent. Matter of Alaire K.G. v. Anthony P.G., 86 AD3d 216 (1st Dept. 2011) (Saxe, J., dissenting). Indeed, a child's best interest is protected by ensuring the fullest possible relationship with both parents. Nimkoff v. Nimkoff, 18 AD3d 344 (1st Dept. 2005).
Consideration of whether the relocation of the child would negatively
affect the fundamental right of reasonable access of the parent left
behind clearly is essential. Bodrato v. Biggs, 274 AD2d 694 (3d Dept. 2000).
The law requires that the interests which might justify such a
relocation by the custodial parent be balanced against the noncustodial
parent's fundamental human right to frequent visitation and, most
significantly, by the best interests of the children. Rybicki v. Rybicki, 176 AD2d 86 (2d Dept. 1991).
Plaintiff's Reasons for Seeking the Move
The Court considers the Plaintiff's reason(s) for seeking the move to
be both familial and economic in nature, and to enhance the lives of
the children. In Matter of Amber GG. v. Eric HH.,
the Third Department reversed family court's denial of an application
by the mother therein to relocate to Florida, finding, in part, that
"... [t]aken as a whole, the mother's testimony demonstrated ... that
the mother's reasons for wanting to relocate were familial and economic
and that the proposed relocation would likely enhance the lives of the
mother and the child[ren] economically and emotionally..." Matter of Amber GG. v. Eric HH., 217 AD3d 1103 (3d Dept. 2023).
If the Mother were permitted to relocate to Maryland, the Court finds
that the lives of the children would be enhanced. The Court finds that
the children will have an appropriate and suitable living abode in
Maryland, and that they would be able to live with their step-siblings.
As elicited on direct examination of Mr. A (who testified credibly):
Q: Now, with regard to your residence in Silver Spring,
describe the house or take us through a verbal virtual tour of your
home?
A: S and I, we were together on the decision for the
purchase. It's a five bedroom single-family home in a Washington D.C.
suburb. The kids, they've got rooms there. Her kids have rooms as well.
They've got beds. Furniture. The girls sleep together. My son Y who's
four sleeps by himself. And then SN and SS, they have their own room,
bunk beds.
In this regard, Mr. A's testimony credibly painted a colorful picture
of the home in which the G children would be living in. Of course, they
would share that home with their step-siblings. The Court finds that
the space and the sleeping arrangements to be appropriate for the ages
of the children herein, and that living with their step-siblings would
enhance the lives of these children. The Mother testified on direct
examination with respect to her desire to relocate:
Q: Can you discuss your living arrangement currently with Mr. A a little bit further?
A: Yes. So, when I have my children for the weekend he
drives up on Friday or he takes the train and he goes into Penn Station
and then he'll take the train from Penn Station to Far Rockaway or he
will just drive straight. He comes in before Shabbos. He is with us
until usually Wednesday. Wednesday evening he leaves, sometimes Tuesday
he leaves. And then I, on Friday, depending on when Shabbos starts,
either I drop off my kids and I work from the car as I drive to
Maryland, or if Shabbos is later then I pick up the kids from school, I
make sure they're all settled, and then I bring them over to their
father's house and then I go straight to Silver Spring at around 12
o'clock and then I drive and I pick up our chidren by 6 o'clock, and
because Mike is staying in Silver Spring and I'm coming back here and
then we don't see each other until Friday.
Q: Now, in what way or ways has you and he maintaining two
separate residences in two separate states impacted your relationship
and your ordinary daily life?
A: So for the time that we're together we're a married
couple, and then the time of the week that we're not its like a back to
single-mom-hood and we, you know — CS is always like, I need to Facetime
abba the minute she comes home and the boys are asking, "Where is
abba?" "Where is abba?" and we're both for that week single parents
again.
The Mother credibly convinced this Court that the proposed relocation
would be a betterment and enhancement of the emotional state(s) of the
chid(ren). Without objection or contradiction, the Court notes that it
appears from the testimony (see supra) that these children
unilaterally, and of their own volition, refer to Mr. A as "abba",
which, in Hebrew, means "Father". The testimony of the Mother did not at
all come off as that the children are attempting to replace the Father
with Mr. A. Rather, to the Court, this credible testimony demonstrated
an extreme level of comfort and security with Mr. A. The evidence and
testimony at the Hearing has also convinced this Court that the
relationship of the G children and Mr. A's children are akin to bonded
step-siblings. The Court certainly finds that the G children living with
their step-siblings enhances their lives. In addition, the Court
carefully and closely examined the Mother during her testimony about her
current living arrangements with Mr. A. She credibly testified that it
is, in effect, her desire to relocate so that she can live permanently
with Mr. A, instead of spending extended periods of time apart from the
man who is her husband. The Court also finds tangentially that these
childrens' lives would be enhanced by the Mother being able to
permanently live with Mr. A. The Mother's emotional struggle in being
separated part of the time from Mr. A was evident, and this Court does
not wish to adversely affect the emotional states of these children by
keeping their Mother separated from her husband. Not only that, but this
Court considers that factor in conjunction with the fact that the
Mother always has been, is and remains the primary caretaker of these
children, who spend a majority of time with the Mother.
In furtherance of that, the Mother painted a difficult picture surrounding the socialization of these children:
Q: Now, you mentioned socialization for your children being
something that was a thought process to you at the time you made a move
with regard to each of your children individually; how would you
describe them socially?
A: SN, he just moved into eighth grade so he's transitioning
to those boys, but he's fine. He doesn't have any close friends. I
think he's kind of gambling between the seventh graders and eight [sic]
graders right now. He used to have a close friend, that was in seventh
grade, but they kind of lost touch.
SS doesn't have any close friends. He doesn't like playing
with anyone at their house. He is like one of the boys and all the
teachers have always told me that, no, he'll play with the boys, but he
doesn't have any close friends.
CS, she's also — she's struggling with close friends. No one
calls her for play dates. On Friday afternoon we call together to
arrange play dates for Shabbos afternoon and everyone is always busy
with somebody else, so it's hard. I don't think the class she's in right
now is the right class. She's of the age that she should have a close
friend and she just doesn't so something needs to change with her.
The Court found the Mother's testimony sincere and remarkable in this
respect. This Court carefully observed the Mother during this testimony
and her tone and demeanor was one of outright concern for the social
status of these children. Unfortunately, these children do not appear to
have any close friends, if any friends at all. While the Father
testified on direct examination that the children have friends, there
was insufficient evidence in the record to indicate to the Court who
those friends are, how much time the children spend with those friends,
and what the children do when with those friends. The Court finds that
by granting the proposed relocation to Maryland, not only would it not
disrupt any of the children's existing social relationships, but it will
likely serve as a vehicle for enhancement thereof. These children may
start afresh in new schools with the ability to make new friends (which
they have not been able to do). Additionally, the Court notes that Mr. A
testified that his children from his first marriage are with him for a
substantial period of time. Notably, as elicited on direct examination:
Q: Can you briefly describe it for the Court when the children are with you?
A: Sure. So they are with me about 40 percent of the time as
per the agreement. It comes up to a little bit more than that in
practice. The children, they live with me. When they are with me they
have their entire lives out of my house, everything is there, all their
clothes, everything is based out of my house.
By granting the proposed relocation, the subject children will have
the additional benefit of spending nearly forty percent of the time with
Mr. A's siblings, who this Court finds can help better enhance the
socialization of the subject children.
The Mother's reasons for seeking the relocation is a factor that weighs in favor of granting the request for relocation.
Defendant's Reasons for Opposing the Move
The Father testified on his direct examination as follows:
Q: Can you explain the value that you place upon the weekly Thursday dinners?
A: Yes. For me it — the value that I place on it is that it is the touchstone and the anchor
where even on the weeks that I don't have them for the weekend, it's
the only time I could see them in person and spend time with them and
talk with them, hug them and just — and be with them. So it's of essential importance.
Q: And would that be fulfilled with weekly virtual chats instead?
A: No, it would not.
Q: Why not?
A: Well, first of all, I find out a lot more about their
lives when they are actually by me. When they are speaking to me from
their mother's house, they are understandably more circumspect and just
kind of talking on a more kind of polished, external level. Everything
is good, yeah.
But when they're by me, they open up. I find out things about them, I
see their faces. I get to touch them, they get to touch me. There is a
certain quality that's hard to put your finger on that I think most
parents and children can attest to is essential to being with your
children in person.
But the Father's words, coupled with his actions, in this instance,
are incongruous. To explain: the Father, in effect, opposes the Mother's
proposed relocation because, in part, the relocation would prevent him
from exercising his ninety (90) minute parenting time on Thursdays. Yet,
his actions in agreeing to permit SN to attend dorm at school in
Maryland is at variance with his words inasmuch as the Father would miss out on his weekly Thursday parenting time with SN if the Court were to deny the Mother's application for relocation.
The Court did not find persuasive the Father's argument that Maryland
is, in effect, not a "safe" place or that the Baltimore area is not a
"safe" city inasmuch as there was no evidence provided at the Hearing to
demonstrate the unsafeness of Maryland. The Court appreciates the
Father's argument that, in effect, his entire new family, including Ms. C
and her children, would have to travel to Maryland with him once a
month. However, the Court does not find that it is a bar to the proposed
relocation. Sometimes, however, doing something that is in the best
interests of all of your children involves making a sacrifice or
sacrifices for the betterment of those children. While the Court
certainly finds no reason why Ms. C and her children cannot accompany
the Father on his alternating weekend visitation in Maryland (see infra), the Court finds this reason to be unpersuasive.
The Court also appreciates the Father's argument that, if the Mother
is permitted to relocate, during one of the alternating weekend visits,
some of the children may miss a few hours of school. The Court does not
find this to be a bar to the proposed relocation either. While the Court
emphasizes the importance of schooling, the Court does not find that a
few hours once per month will be so detrimental to the educational needs
or the schooling of the children. The Mother is, of course, strongly
cautioned to minimize the amount of time that the children must be taken
out of school early on those Fridays when transporting the children to
New York. While the Father testified that missing school will cause
stress to be put onto those children, the Court is unsure if that stress
will be thrust upon those children, and, the Court finds that the
proposed relocation to Maryland will outweigh any stress that the
children may experience by missing a few hours of school only once per
month.
With respect to the Father's argument that the proposed relocation,
if granted, will uproot the children from the Five Towns where they have
lived for years, the Court has considered same, and does not find it to
be a bar to the proposed relocation. While the children may have lived
here for many years, any roots that the children may have had in this
community has not significantly helped or improved their social status.
With respect to the children's attendance at religious institutions, the
children can certainly find new religious institutions to be a part of
and nonetheless remain in contact with any religious advisors that they
have may here. Another consideration: the Father consented to send SN to
a school in Maryland, rather than have him attend a school here in New
York. In furtherance thereof, the Father has effectively consented to
and allowed the uprooting of SN from New York to not only attend school,
but to live at school out of State as well.
The Father's reasons for opposing the relocation is a factor that does not weigh against the request for relocation.
Quality of the Relationship with the Mother
To this Court, there is no question that the Mother has been the
primary caretaker of these children since their birth. This is
underscored by the Father's voluntary vacatur from the marital residence
before the parties signed the Stipulation and the Father's agreement to
designate the Mother as the primary physical parent of these children
as set forth in the Stipulation. There is no dispute that the Mother
continues to be the primary caretaker of these children, and the Father
effectively admitted and conceded same at the Hearing. The evidence and
testimony at the Hearing established to the satisfaction of this Court
that the children are significantly bonded to their Mother.
The quality of the relationship with the Mother is a factor that weighs in favor of granting the request for relocation.
Quality of the Relationship with the Father
The testimony at the Hearing leads the Court to the conclusion that
while the Father is one who generally visits with the children and
exercises his parenting time, he is, in effect, only a visiting parent.
While there is nothing wrong with being a visiting parent, the quality
of the relationship with the Father is not one of being an active
parent, and is not one that would prevent a relocation. For instance,
the testimony to this Court established that when the Mother suspected
the Father of using Adderall inappropriately, she unilaterally elected
to truncate and relegate the Father's access to that of supervised
parenting time. The Father did not seek to enforce and/or expand his
parenting time until after the Mother filed her application in May of 2021 (see infra). What is more, instead of exercising that time, albeit in a supervised setting, he elected to see the children in his car. In sum, the Father viewed a few short minutes of time with his children in his car
to be quality time. While that may have been quality time to the
Father, it does not necessarily mean that it was quality time to the
children, nor does it mean that it was in the best interests of the
children. Indeed, while these children love their Father, these children
will certainly continue to love him, and continue to visit with him, if
they live in Maryland. The Father's mere reactive nature relative to
his parenting time prior to court intervention is consistent with that
of simply a visiting parent. Plain and simply, the Father can still
visit with the children if they were to live in Maryland.
The quality of the relationship with the Father can still be preserved (see infra) in spite of the relocation, and, therefore, this is not a factor that militates against the request for relocation.
Impact of the Move on the Quantity and Quality of the Children's Future Contact with the Father
As stated aforesaid, the Court does not find that the proposed
relocation to Maryland will negatively or adversely affect the quantity
and quality of the Father's future contact with the children. Quantitatively,
the Father will maintain his alternating weekend parental access with
the children. In fact, the Court will be expanding his alternating
weekend access so that on the alternate weekend that he is visiting the
children in Maryland, his weekend will start on Thursday instead of
Friday, and conclude on Monday morning, instead of Sunday night, which
gives him one Thursday overnight per month and one Sunday overnight per
month, something he does not have under the existing Stipulation. The
Court notes that while the three other Thursdays will not be occurring
on a weekly basis, the Court will make this up to the Father by giving
him an additional ten (10) consecutive days in the summer months with
the children. Qualitatively, irrespective of whether or not the
Father is exercising parenting time in Maryland or in New York, his time
with the children does not have to change. He can still help the
children study, he can still eat Kosher food with them, he can still
hold conversations with them, he can still touch and hug them, and he
can still partake in activities with them, such as playing basketball or
hiking.
The impact of the move on the quantity and quality of the children's
future contact with the Father does not weigh in favor of denying the
proposed relocation.
Degree to Which the Mother's and Children's Lives may be Enhanced Economically, Emotionally and Educationally by the Move
The Court finds that the proposed relocation will enhance the
Mother's life and the lives of the children economically, emotionally
and educationally. Economically, the Court notes that Mr. A
testified that he is employed as a data engineer with FINRA earning
approximately $185,000.00 per annum. The testimony at the Hearing also
revealed that the Mother is employed as a registered investment advisory
with MWM Group earning anywhere between $120,000.00 to $150,000.00 per
annum. The Mother is earning more now then when she was at the time of
the Judgment, and it does not appear that her employment will be
adversely affected if she is permitted to relocate, as she testified
that she works remotely. The Court notes that the underlying Stipulation
provides, in sum and substance, that the Father is to pay $900.00 per
month as and for child support for the first three years and then the
sum of $1,100,00 per month as and for child support. In the Stipulation,
the Father's gross income was $50,000.00 per annum. The Court notes
that the $900.00 per month sum was a slight downward deviation from the
presumptive amount of child support pursuant to the Child Support
Standards Act.
Emotionally, the Court finds that the Mother's life and the
lives of the children will be enhanced. As to the Mother, she will no
longer have to spend consecutive days away from Mr. A and have the
constant back-and-forth feeling of being married to being a single
mother. As to the children, while they will be able to now live with Mr.
A (who they refer to as "abba"), they will still nonetheless be
maintaining just as much, if not more, of their parental access schedule
with their Father (see infra). Visitation is a joint right of the noncustodial parent and of the child. See generally Weiss v. Weiss, 52 NY2d 170 (1981).
Likewise, the proposed relocation will enable SS and CS to live close
to SN inasmuch as he will be attending school in Maryland on consent of the Father (see infra).
Educationally, the Court likewise finds that the lives of the children will be advanced. The parties' Stipulation provides:
Religious Upbringing. The parties agree to continue to raise
the Children in the Jewish Orthodox tradition and philosophy, including
without limitation, observing the Sabbath, Jewish holiday observance,
and adherence to the laws of Kashrut (kosher food), which shall be
followed in the parties' residences while the children are present. The
parties further agree to follow all of the rules of the school attended
by the Children when the Children are in his/her care. In the event that
the parties cannot reach an agreement with regard to a religious
decision, the parties shall consult with Rabbi Reich with an eye towards
mediating and resolving their difference of opinion. Any religious
school issues shall be mediated by Rabbi Sitnick.
The Court finds that the Mother will be able to maintain her home in
Maryland in accordance with the tenants of her religion and pursuant to
the Stipulation, and that she will be able to follow the rules of the
school in her home. Additionally, SS and CS will be able to attend
schools in Maryland consistent with their religious upbringing.
The degree to which the Mother's and children's lives may be enhanced
economically, emotionally and educationally by the move weighs in favor
of the proposed relocation.
Feasibility of Preserving the Relationship Between the Father and Child Through Suitable Visitation Arrangements
Here, the proposed relocation to Maryland will not disrupt the
Father's alternating weekend parental access with the children. In fact,
not only will the Court be preserving the Father's access with the
children, it will, in its totality, be expanding his access (see infra).
That will include maintaining his alternating weekend schedule,
expanding his parental access in over the summer, and not completely
eliminating his Thursday weekly parental access by giving the Father one
Thursday overnight per month when he is visiting the children in
Maryland (see infra).
Inasmuch as the Court is expanding the Father's parental access with
the children, this Court finds that it is able to feasibly preserve the
relationship between the Father and the children by giving the Father
more quality time with the children, which the Court finds weighs in
favor of granting the proposed relocation.
Position of the Attorney for the Children
The Attorney for the Children supports the Mother's application
seeking permission to relocate to Maryland. While not necessarily
determinative, the child[ren]'s expressed preference is some indication
of what is in his or her best interests and, in weighing that factor, a
court must consider the age and maturity of the child[ren]. Matter of David v, LoPresti, 176 AD3d 701 (2d Dept. 2019).
While the AFC in her written summations has stated that "... all three
of the children have different opinions but would prefer those opinions
not be shared with their parents...", the AFC nonetheless sets forth a
position that the Mother should be permitted to relocate with the
children. The Court has therefore given the position of the AFC its
appropriate weight. See also Davis v. Ogden, 109 AD3d 539 (2d Dept. 2013) (affirming family court's order granting permission to relocate to Florida which considered, inter alia, that the position of the attorney for the children was in favor of the relocation).
Inasmuch as the position of the AFC is in favor of relocation, the
Court finds this factor to weigh in favor of granting the relocation.
Other Factors Considered by the Court[4]
In addition to the aforesaid Tropea factors, the Court has considered other factors (see infra).
First, the Father's failure to request custody as an alternative to the proposed relocation. In Mathie v. Mathie,
the plaintiff therein, who was the physical custodian of the child
therein, remarried and desired to move with the child to New Jersey. Mathie v. Mathie, 65 AD3d 527 (2d Dept. 2009). The hearing court, after a hearing, denied the application to relocate. Mathie, 65 AD3d at 529. The Second Department reversed and granted the application to relocate, noting, in part, that "... [s]ignificantly, the defendant did not seek custody of [the child therein] as an alternative to the plaintiff's relocation application...." Id.
(emphasis added). Here, the Court notes that the Father did not seek
custody of the children as an alternative to the Mother's application
seeking to relocate to Maryland. Rather, and notably, the Father only
sought to expand his access on June 16, 2021,[5] which, tellingly, was only after the Mother interposed her application for, inter alia,
sole custody, supervised access and drug testing. To the Court, his
conduct was, at best, that of a reactive parent, instead of that of a
proactive parent. In furtherance of the aforesaid, the Father's conduct
after the Mother initiated Court intervention is consistent with his
conduct undertaken both during the marriage and after the parties'
executed the Stipulation: that of a parent who simply defers to the
decisions of and reacts to the other parent, as well as that of a
visiting parent. While the Court does not begrudge the Father for being
reactive, his conduct — even if tacitly taken — leads this Court to the
conclusion that his opposition to the Mother's proposed relocation is
only in his interests, and not the interests of the children. The
Father, in effect, deferred a majority of the decisions for the children
and caretaking of the children to the Mother. For instance, as elicited
on cross-examination of the Father by the AFC:
Q: Would it be fair to say through no fault of your own that
S has basically been the primary person responsible for bringing the
children to the doctor?
A: Yes.
MS. MARKFIELD: Can we have a timeframe? Always?
MS. LATZMAN: Since the separation.
A: Repeat the question.
Q: Since you have been separated, would it be fair to say
that S has been primarily responsible to bring the children to the
doctor?
A: Yes, she has.
Q: And to bring the children to the dentist?
A: Yes, she has.
Q: And to make sure that the children get up every morning and get to school?
A: They are usually by her, so yes.
Q: So the children spend most of their time with their mother in her home, correct?
A: Correct.
* * *
Q: So you kind of rely on her to do all of those things, didn't you?
A: I knew she was doing it. I trusted she was doing it.
Second, the Father's habitual deferral to the Mother's
decisions. The testimony at the Hearing was replete with testimony from
the Father that the Mother, in effect, made decisions without him. For
example, and in sum and substance, the Mother unilaterally decided that
his contact with the children should be supervised, that she did not
tell the Father about the interview at the Baltimore School, that she
let her new husband take the child to the interview at the Baltimore
school rather than provide him with the opportunity to do so, that she
did not list the Father's appropriate contact information on the
application for the interview at the Baltimore school, and so on. The
Court highlights this conduct not to countenance it, but to make
critical point: that the Father, despite all of these complaints, and
despite all of the Mother's unilateral actions, some of which may have
been in violation of the parties' Stipulation, did not seek custody of
these children. Once again, the Father's inaction and reactive nature confirms the narrative: that he is simply visiting parent (see supra).
While there is nothing wrong with being a visiting parent, this Court
can maintain his status as a visiting parent — and even expand it — even
in spite of granting the Mother permission to relocate. The Court takes
this time to remind the Mother of her obligations under the Stipulation
regarding decision-making.
Third, the Father's consent to SN attending school in Maryland
and this Court's reluctance to separate these siblings from one
another. The Father acknowledged that he is consenting to SN
attending school in Baltimore, Maryland, which is in the same state
where the Mother seeks to relocate to. Yet, he opposes the relocation of
the other two children to Maryland. So, in effect, he consents to one
child being in Maryland, but not the other two. Ostensibly, therefore,
SN would be living in and going to school in Baltimore while the other
two children would be here living in New York. The Father's consent to
SN attending school in Baltimore, Maryland, is a factor in favor of
permitting a relocation. Courts should be reluctant to separate
siblings. Matter of Nikolic v. Ingrassia, 47 AD3d 819 (2d Dept. 2008); see also Matter of Lightbody v. Lightbody, 42 AD3d 537 (2d Dept. 2007).
Here, the evidence and testimony at the Hearing establishes that the
children enjoy a close relationship with one another, for instance, that
they pray together, attend the Synagogue together, play board games
together, play basketball together, and partake in other activities
which siblings often partake in. This Court would find it contrary to
the best interests of these children to separate them and have one of
them live in one state, and two of them living in another state. In
fact, the Father's position makes it impossible to separate these
siblings, as he has not asked for custody of the children as an
alternative to the Mother's proposed relocation. This Court has, in this
regard, carefully considered the testimony of the parties surrounding
each child's socialization and the Court believes that separating them —
in light of the de minimis and insubstantial friendships they have with others — would do more harm to their socialization than good.
Fourth, leaving SN in Maryland at school without a parent
nearby. The Father's consent to SN attending school in Maryland but
opposition to the Mother's request for relocation creates a quandry:
this would effectively force SN to attend school out-of-state without a
parent living in close proximity thereto. The indisputable evidence at
the Hearing established that the Mother remains the primary caretaker of
these children, and if the Court were disinclined to grant the
relocation, it would effectively force SN to be separated from his
Mother. Children often times lean on their primary caretaker in the
event of a medical, physical or emotional emergency, and to have the
Mother living far away in a distant state without that safety net for
that child would be contrary to his best interests, and this Court
declines to countenance such a result.
Fifth, the parties' underlying Stipulation and Judgment is a
byproduct of a voluntary agreement between the parties that gave the
Mother primary physical custody of the children. The Court initially
notes that the underlying Stipulation[6] provides the following:
The parties agree that the MOTHER and FATHER shall share
joint legal custody of the Children. The MOTHER shall be the primary
residential custodial parent, subject to the FATHER's parenting rights
as provided herein.
The Judgment[7] provides that the "... Plaintiff/Mother having physical custody of the Children subject to the Defendant/Father's parenting time..." The Court has considered that in 2019, the parties agreed
that the Mother would be the primary residential parent of the
children. When the parties have entered into an agreement as to which
parent should have custody, priority should be given to the custody
arrangement reached by voluntary agreement. Prete v. Prete, 193 AD2d 804 (2d Dept. 1993); see also Matter of Russell v. Russell, 72 AD3d 973 (2d Dept. 2010). This Court has given the appropriate weight to the fact that the parties voluntarily agreed
that the children would reside principally with the Mother, and that
the children continue to principally reside with the Mother.[8]
Sixth, Mr. A, who is no substitute for the Father, acts
appropriately with the subject children. The Court had the opportunity
to observe his demeanor, tone and sincerity. The Court found him to be
credible and sincere. He credibly testified that he has previously spent
time with the subject children, that he purchases items for the subject
children, that he learns with the subject children, that he studies the
Torah with the subject children, and that he genuinely attempts to bond
with and spend as much time as he can with the subject children. The
Court finds that the subject children are adequately safeguarded by Mr.
A.
Seventh, as elicited on re-cross examination of the Father by the AFC:
Q: You indicated that the children were made aware of the relocation before the Court order was vacated, correct, you said that?
A: Yes, I did.
Q: So that means you had conversations with them regarding the relocation?
A: They reported to me.
Q: That was not my question, it was a yes or no question.
Did you have conversations with them prior to the vacating of the order
regarding the relocation, yes you did, no, you didn't?
A: Sorry, prior to vacating the order?
Q: Yes.
A: What is vacating?
Q: There was an order the Court then said that order does not exist anymore.
A: Yes.
Q: Did you have conversations before that order did not exist anymore, yes, you did, no, you didn't?
A: I did not have conversations with them during the time of the order at all.
Q: You testified that they knew?
A: Before the order. Before the order was given, it was not given right away.
Q: Before the order was given, you had conversations with them regarding the relocations?
A: I responded.
Q: Yes or no?
A: Yes.
Q: And what did you say to them?
A: I don't remember exactly.
Q: Did you discuss relocation with them, yes or no?
A: I told them —
Q: Yes or no, not what you told them. Yes or no. Listen to my questions, please.
Did you discuss relocation with them?
A: Yes.
Q: What did you tell them?
A: Again, I don't remember exactly. It was probably something like —
MS. MARKFIELD: I'm objecting to this line of questioning.
This is beyond the scope of my redirect. There was no questioning on my
redirect regarding any conversations with the kids regarding relocation.
MS. LATZMAN: You allowed it in his recross therefore, I have a right because you allowed it, correct? You did not object.
Q: Back to my question.
What did you say?
A: Again, I don't remember what I said exactly. It was something in the spirit of I don't want you moving so far away from me.
Q: And who was present during these conversations?
A: My children.
* * *
Q: The only conversation you had with your children is I
don't want you to move, I will miss you. That's the only thing you said
regarding this litigation and the relocation?
A: I wanted to make, I wanted to tell them that I don't have anything against mom being happy or married. I
don't want you to move because it would be difficult for us to have the
relationship we have. I don't want you to be so far away and I know
from personal experience switching schools and switching cities can be
very stressful is a big risk and I don't want that.
(emphasis added).
The Court found the Father's responses to this line of questioning to
initially be evasive. Upon further probing by the AFC, the Court finds
that the Father attempted to unduly influence these children regarding
the Mother's proposed relocation. Not only did the Father attempt to
extract sympathy from the children by stating to them that they would be
"... so far away from me...", he went further by telling them about his
personal experiences regarding switching school and cities is
"stressful" and a "big risk". The Court, therefore, has considered the
Father's attempted undue influence vis-a-vis the issue of relocation.
Eighth, and finally, the Father's effectual deferral to SN's
wishes about where he wants to attend school. As elicited on redirect
examination of the Father:
Q: So, just as a final question on this topic, what is your final position on the school?
A: I am ambivalent, but at the end of the day, this is
the school that my son wants. He is excited about it, generally in good
spirits right now and with him going to the school at part of what is
helping him to be in good spirits, I would not mess with that and I
would ultimately consent to him going.
While the express wishes of children are not controlling, they are
entitled to great weight, especially where their age and maturity would
make their input particularly meaningful. Silverman v. Silverman, 186 AD3d 123 (2d Dept. 2020).
Here, the Father's testimony confirms that while he was opposed to the
Mother's proposed relocation, he nonetheless deferred to the decision
and opinion SN about the school he wished to attend, which is in
Maryland. As elicited on cross-examination of the Father by the Mother's
counsel:
Q: When did your son first communicate to you that he was
interest in attending a Yeshiva high school that offered the ability to
board?
A: I would say about March time.
Q: March of this year?
A: Yes.
* * *
Q: And we spent a lot of time this morning talking about the
application process to the the boarding school in the Baltimore area.
Your son did, in fact, get in?
A: He did.
Q: And did he share with you that he had been accepted?
A: Yes, he did.
Q: And was he excited? Did he appear excited to you?
A: Yes, he did.
* * *
Q: As we stand here today, July 10th of this year, do you, sir, object to your son attending The boarding school?
A: I do not object.
Furthermore, as elicited on cross-examination of the Father by the AFC:
Q: So, in reality and when I ask you this question, I don't
want you to think I'm judging you, you are the father and you have a
right to these feelings, so most of how you feel is that your
relationship with your children clearly would be impacted if they were
to relocate?
A: I would not say that's my primary concern.
Q: If your children indicated a desire to relocate, don't you think it would be important to hear what they have to say?
A: Surely it would be important to hear what they have to say.
Q: And would that be more important than your own feelings regarding relocation?
A: Their assessment of whether relocation for them is good for them if a good thing or not, I trust my feelings better. My sense of what are the risks and what life has taught me the last 40 years.
The Court find's the Father's testimony to be contradictory. On the
one hand, he, in effect and in sum and substance, trusts his life
experiences learned over the last forty years and that his feelings
about the children possibly relocating are superior to his children's
feelings. Yet, on the other hand, the Father admittedly and in effect
deferred to the eldest's son's choice about attending school
out-of-state. Instead of making the decision himself about the schooling
in another state for his child, the Father ostensibly deferred that
decision to the child. The Court, in this respect, does not find the
Father's testimony to be credible.
Accordingly, and for all of the reasons stated herein, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (A) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated
September 12, 2022 be and the same is hereby GRANTED TO THE EXTENT that
the parties' Judgment of Divorce dated January 30, 2020 is hereby
MODIFIED TO THE EXTENT that the Mother is permitted to relocate with the
subject children to Silver Spring, Maryland; and it is further
ORDERED, that the Mother shall provide to the Father the home address
of the residence in which she and the children will be residing in
Maryland in within seven (7) days of the date of this Decision and
Order; and it is further
ORDERED, that Branch (c) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
August 26, 2021 be and the same is hereby GRANTED TO THE EXTENT that
the Mother shall provide to the Father the home telephone number of the
residence in which she and the children will be residing in Maryland in
within seven (7) days of the date of this Decision and Order.
MODIFICATION OF PARENTAL ACCESS
In order to modify an existing court-sanctioned parental access
agreement, there must be a showing that there was a sufficient change in
circumstances so that modification is required to protect the best
interests of the child (see Katsoris v. Katsoris, 178 AD3d 794 (2d Dept. 2019)) as well as the welfare of the child (see Matter of Ya Yun Weng v. Zhi Gao, 214 AD3d 895)).
The paramount concern in a parental access determination is the best
interests of the child, under the totality of the circumstances. Matter of Quattrochi v. Negri, 187 AD3d 921 (2d Dept. 2020). The determination of appropriate parental access is entrusted to the sound discretion of the court. Matter of Johnson v. McWilliams, 212 AD3d 620 (2d Dept. 2023).
In Matter of Newton v. McFarlane,
the Second Department opined that a child has a real and substantial
interest in the outcome of litigation between the parents. Matter of Newton v. McFarlane, 174 AD3d 67 (2d Dept. 2019). As that Court stated:
Litigation over established court-approved child custody and
access arrangements can be unsettling and traumatic for children,
particularly for children of sufficient age or maturity to comprehend,
and worry about, potentially significant changes in their daily lives,
such as what home they live in, what family members they live with, what
schools they go to, what friends they have, and what activities they
undertake.
Matter of Newton, 174 AD3d at 76.
Here, the Court finds that the Father has met his burden in
establishing that the best interests of these children would be served
and protected by expanded parental access with him. Parental access
should be regular, frequent and meaningful. See generally Radford v. Propper, 190 AD2d 93 (2d Dept. 1993).
Notwithstanding that the Court grants the Mother's request to relocate,
the Court is nonetheless able to provide the Father with expanded,
meaningful access. In determining custody, while the express wishes of
children are not controlling, they are entitled to great weight,
especially where their age and maturity would make their input
particularly meaningful. Silverman v. Silverman, 186 AD3d 123 (2d Dept. 2020); Matter of Cannella v. Anthony, 127 AD3d 745 (2d Dept. 2015); Matter of Samuel S. v. Dayawathie R., 63 AD3d 746 (2d Dept. 2009). While not controlling or dispositive, the wishes and desires of these children are entitled to some weight, based upon their ages and maturity. As the AFC conveyed in a portion of her opening statement:
MS. LATZMAN: Good morning, your Honor.
Your Honor, you listen to the attorneys and it sounds like
there's a lot of animosity. When you speak to the children, you find
three children who love both parents dearly, who have a great time with
each parent, who no nothing about this relocation. They have not been
put in the middle, which I think is probably the most wonderful thing
that no one asked them to make a decision because they're children and
they shouldn't be making a decision; therefore, I can't take a position
on their account regarding the relocation. But I can tell the Court that
they've made it very clear to me that they love spending time with
their father and his wife, they love spending time with their mother and
her husband. They find everyone to be wonderful and kind and caring.
They also told me very clearly that they want to spend more time with
their father.
No one has advised the Court that at the present time the
schedule is Thursdays for dinner, every Thursday, and then alternate
weekends from Friday to Sunday, that's the schedule. The children want
more time with their father. They's like to see him more, they'd like to
spend more time with him. They have a good time there. I'm also told
that SN really wants to go to this boarding school and he advises me
that everyone has consented; again, parents working together for this
boy so that he can go where he wants to go. He intends to spend one
weekend a month with each parent. Interestingly enough, the other two
children are happy to see him go because SS told me he'll then have a
room of his own and he won't need to share anymore. And CS told me that
he's not that friendly any way so it's okay.
THE COURT: So they're kids.
MS. LATZMAN: They're kids. And that's what's so, in a way,
tragic here. They are kids. They're three actually lovely children
thanks to these people. And, your Honor, Ms. Markfield told you how he
used to visit in the car; do you know that mom never told the children
why. Never shared information with these children about their father.
Never in a way said something negative or told them things. These are
people who have really shielded their children and taken care of their
children and made sure that their children grow up to have wonderful
lives. And the tragedy is we're going to sit here today and your Honor
is going to have to make a decision, and no matter what your decision
is, it's going to change these children's lives and that's too bad.
The only position I have is if they could see their father more that's what they want. Thank you, your Honor.
Under the existing schedule pursuant to the Stipulation, the Father
sees the children every other weekend for two full days (Friday to
Sunday) and for ninety (90) minutes one day per week (Thursday). While
the Court understands that granting of the Mother's application makes
the Father's Thursday night ninety (90) minute dinner visit with the
children impossible, the Court finds that quality time with the Father
is better spent by the granting to him of two additional overnights per
month. In this regard, the Court finds that by expanding one of the
Father's alternating weekend parental access periods from Thursday to
Monday (see infra) instead of Friday to Sunday, the children will
be able to spend two additional overnights with the Father. This will
enable the Father to, among other things and for example, have dinner
with the children two more nights, study with the children two more
nights, engage in activities with the children two more nights, and to
be able to say "goodnight" and put his children to bed two additional
nights. While seeing his children once per week under the existing
schedule may be beneficial to the Father, the reality is that after only
ninety minutes with the Father on a Thursday under the existing
schedule, these children must leave; they must say "goodbye". The
extension and expansion of the Father's alternate weekend access on one
weekend eliminates a quick visit where the children conceivably yearn
for more time, while providing to the Father and the children two more full nights that they can spend with each other. To reiterate: visitation is a joint right of the noncustodial parent and the children. See generally Matter of Spampinato v. Mazza, 152 AD3d 525 (2d Dept. 2017).
The Court is therefore expanding the Father's parental access insofar
as maintaining the concept of an "every other weekend" schedule, but
modifying it insofar as the Father shall have the children on
alternating weekends, with one weekend being from Friday to Sunday (to
take place in New York) and with the other weekend being from Thursday
to Monday (to take place in Maryland). The Court additionally awards the
Father ten (10) days of uninterrupted access with the children over the
summer. While the Court certainly notes that the "quantity" of time may
be slightly reduced, the "quality" of time that the Father will have
with these children is certainly expanded. The Court finds that the best
interests of these children will be better served by additional quality
time with their Father, which includes additional overnights. To adopt
the logic of the Father that his Thursday night ninety (90) minute
parental access periods should, in part, prevent a relocation fails to
see the forest through the trees. These children's best interests would
much better be served by spending two more overnights per month with the
Father, rather than a mere ninety minutes on a Thursday. Ninety minutes
once a week barely gives these children enough time to truly bond with
their Father. The Court finds that the two additional overnights per
month with the Father, along with the additional ten (10) days of
uninterrupted access in the summer, meaningfully replaces the mere ninety (90) minutes of parental access on Thursday nights.
According, and for all of the aforesaid reasons, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (d) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
June 16, 2021, Branch (c) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
June 3, 2022 and Branch (B) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated
September 12, 2022 be and the same are all hereby GRANTED TO THE EXTENT
set forth in this Decision and Order such that the parental access
provisions of the parties' Judgment of Divorce dated January 30, 2020 is
hereby MODIFIED TO THE EXTENT set forth in this Decision and Order; and
it is further
ORDERED, that the Father shall have regular parental access with the
subject children, SN, SS and CS on an alternating weekend basis to the
extent and as is more fully set forth in this Decision and Order; and it
is further
ORDERED, that on the first alternate weekend, and on each and every
other alternate weekend thereafter, the Father shall have parenting time
in New York beginning on Friday, commencing two hours before Shabbos,
through Sunday at 5:00 p.m., with the Mother being responsible for the
transportation of the children, with drop-off at the Father's residence
two hours before Shabbos on Friday and pick-up at the Father's residence
on Sunday at 5:00 p.m.; and it is further
ORDERED, that on the second alternate weekend, and on each and every
other alternate weekend thereafter, the Father shall have parenting time
in Maryland beginning on Thursday at 5:00 p.m. through Monday morning
drop-off at school, or if there is no school, drop-off at the Mother's
residence at 9:00 a.m.; and it is further
ORDERED, that on the Father's second alternate weekend of parental
access in Maryland, the Mother shall be liable and responsible for the
cost of a round-trip airline ticket for the Father in economy class, or
the cost of a train ticket for the Father if the Father elects to travel
by train, or the cost of gasoline for the Father's automobile, if the
Father elects to travel by automobile; and it is further
ORDERED, that the Father shall be permitted to purchase his
round-trip economy class airline ticket or his train ticket in advance
and shall submit proof of payment to the Mother within seven (7) days of
purchase thereof, with the Mother to reimburse the Father within seven
(7) days of her receipt of proof of payment thereof; and it is further
ORDERED, that in the event that the Father elects to travel by
automobile, he shall submit proof of payment of all gasoline purchased
to and from New York to Maryland and then Maryland to New York within
seven (7) days of his return to New York, with the Mother to reimburse
the Father within seven (7) days of her receipt of proof of payment
thereof; and it is further
ORDERED, that on the Father's second alternate weekend of parental
access in Maryland, the Mother shall be liable and responsible for the
cost of a hotel room with two bedrooms for the Father and the subject
children or a comparable Airbnb with two bedrooms for the Father and the
subject children; and it is further
ORDERED, that the Father shall be permitted to book a hotel room or
Airbnb in advance and shall submit proof of payment to the Mother within
seven (7) days of purchase thereof, with the Mother to reimburse the
Father within seven (7) days of her receipt of proof of payment thereof;
and it is further
ORDERED, that the Father shall have ten (10) days of uninterrupted
parenting time with the children each and every Summer, which may be
taken either: (a) after the conclusion of school and before summer camp,
or (b) after summer camp and before the commencement of school, or (c)
at anytime during the summer if the children do not attend summer camp;
and it is further
ORDERED, that the one uninterrupted week of parenting time over the
summer shall be selected by the Father at his discretion, which the
selection of dates to be provided to the Mother by not later than May
15th; and it is further
ORDERED, that the Mother shall be responsible for transporting the
children to and from the Father's home in New York at the commencement
and conclusion of his ten (10) uninterrupted days of summer
vacation/access with the children; and it is further
ORDERED, that the modified parental access schedule herein shall
become effective upon the Mother's relocation to Maryland; and it is
further
ORDERED, that Branch (b) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated May 19, 2021 be and the same is hereby DENIED.
MODIFICATION OF CUSTODY/COMPLIANCE WITH ORDERS
During the Hearing, the Mother withdrew her request for a
modification of the Judgment to the extent that she sought sole custody
of the children. Accordingly, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (a) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated
May 19, 2021 be and the same is hereby deemed WITHDRAWN and not
adjudicated herein; and it is further
ORDERED, that Branch (d) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
August 26, 2021 and Branch (E) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause
dated May 19, 2021 be and the same are all hereby GRANTED TO THE EXTENT
that both parties are directed to comply with the custody provisions of
the parties' Stipulation of Settlement dated September 26, 2019, unless
to the extent that any of those provisions were modified or augmented by
this Decision and Order.
MODIFICATION OF DRUG TESTING/OPERATION OF MOTOR VEHICLE
The parties' Stipulation provides:
6.29 DRUG TESTING
A. The FATHER agrees that he will go monthly for drug
testing for two years from the signing of this agreement under the
auspicious [sic] of Dr. Hylton Lightman. In the event he tests positive
for substance abuse, FATHER's visitation will become supervised by a
person of the MOTHER's choice until such time as the Drug testing comes
back clean for a period of three (3) consecutive weeks.
B. The parties acknowledge that the Mother shall have the
right to compel the Father to submit to a random drug test (without
prior order or permission of a court) as she deems appropriate. The
Father shall immediately inform the Mother if he fails any drug test.
C. In the event that the Father fails to submit to a drug
testing in accordance with this Agreement, or a court's directive/order,
or as requested/required by any treating facility or monitoring the
Father's sobriety, including but not limited to an outpatient program
attended by the Father, or if the Father fails a drug test, the Father's
custody and parenting time rights shall be adjusted as follows: Until
such time as the Father tests negatively for drug use for a period of
three (3) consecutive weeks, the Father's parenting time set forth
herein shall be suspended and the Father shall instead be entitled to
weekly supervised parenting time with the Children, supervised by the
Mother or any third party approved by the Mother, which shall not
include overnight parenting time.
D. Furthermore, until such time as the Father tests
negatively for drug use for a period of three (3) consecutive weeks, the
Mother shall have final decision making authority in the event that a
dispute arises between the parties with regard to a major decision
relating to the Child after consultation with the professional involved
in the Child's life pertaining to that particular issue.
Notwithstanding, the parties shall endeavor to avoid making any major
decisions for the Child during such period of time where this provision
with regard to joint legal custody shall apply.
E. This provision shall also apply in the event that the
Father fails to submit to drug testing in accordance with this
Agreement, or a court's directive/order, or as requested by any facility
treating or monitoring the Father's sobriety, including but not limited
to an outpatient program attended by the Father, or if the Father fails
a drug test.
It is clear to the Court from the testimony and evidence adduced at
the Hearing that the Father has a history of using Adderall. It was
clear to the Court that the Father previously entered rehabilitation for
the use and/or misuse of Adderall. While that may have occurred prior
to the execution of the Stipulation, the Court finds his history germane
inasmuch as he seeks to modify the drug testing provisions of the
parties' Stipulation. Notably, the Father testified that he continues to
use Adderall, albeit consistent with how it is prescribed by his
treating clinician. However, what shines bright to the Court is his
continued use of Adderall notwithstanding and irrespective of his prior
stint in rehabilitation. The Father, therefore, has failed to convince
this Court that the drug testing parameters of the underlying
Stipulation should be abated. While the Court lauds the Father for
entering rehabilitation, the Court's duty runs to protect the interests
of the children. Courts should never lose sight of the State's interest
as parens patriae in protecting the well-being of children, as well as
the overwhelming interest in the safety of children. In re Anne BB, 202 AD2d 806 (3d Dept. 1994).
Given the Father's continued use of Adderall, this Court must ensure
that the Father is taking that medication consistent with the parameters
of how it is prescribed, and finds that the drug testing provisions of
the parties' Stipulation should remain in full force and effect.
Accordingly, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (c) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
June 16, 2021 be and the same is hereby DENIED; and it is further
ORDERED, that Branch (D) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause dated
May 19, 2021 be and the same is hereby GRANTED TO THE EXTENT that, when
the children are present in the car with the Father, the Father shall
not operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or illegal
drugs, nor shall he operate said vehicle if he is under the influence of
any prescription medication inconsistent with how said medication is
prescribed.
SUMMER ACCESS 2022
The Court notes that the summer months of 2022 have long passed. Accordingly, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (d) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
June 3, 2022 be and the same is hereby deemed MOOT and not adjudicated
herein.
RIGHT OF FIRST REFUSAL
Inasmuch as the Court has granted the Mother permission to relocate
with the children to Maryland, the Court does not find that granting the
Father the right of first refusal to be practical. In actuality, the
right of first refusal in this instance would be a near impossibility.
In any event, even if the Court had not granted the Mother the right to
relocate to Maryland, it does not find that the Father met his burden to
modify the Judgment insofar as granting him a right of first refusal.
Accordingly, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (e) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated June 3, 2022 be and the same is hereby DENIED.
COUNSEL FEES
Both parties effectively seek reimbursement of some of their counsel
fees incurred in connection with these enforcement of modification
proceedings. Domestic Relations Law § 238 provides, in relevant part,
that:
"... [i]n any action or proceeding to enforce or modify any
provision of a judgment or order entered in an action for divorce ...
the court may in its discretion require either party to pay counsel fees
and fees and expenses of experts directly to the attorney of the other
party to enable the other party to carry on or defend the action or
proceeding as, in the court's discretion, justice requires having regard
to the circumstances of the case and of the respective parties..."
However, the Court has carefully reviewed the exhibits appended by
both parties to their respective applications. While the Defendant
appends his retainer agreement with his counsel to Motion Sequence No.:
002, and while the Plaintiff appends her retainer agreement with her
prior counsel to Motion Sequence No.: 003, neither party appends their
billing invoices/statement(s) for services rendered to their respective
applications. To this end, the Court is unable to determine the amount
of legal fees incurred with respect to the instant application(s) (see generally DeCamello v. DeCamello, 151 AD3d 804 (2d Dept. 2017)
(documentation needed to establish how much in legal fees were
incurred)), which constrains the Court to deny same without prejudice to
renewal upon compliance with the applicable requirements (see generally Daich v. Daich, 153 AD3d 900 (2d Dept. 2017). See also F.J.O. v. M.I.O.,
76 Misc 3d 1207(A) (Supreme Court Nassau County 2022) (denying without
prejudice and with leave to renew counsel fee application in the absence
of statements for services rendered). Accordingly, it is hereby:
ORDERED, that Branch (e) of the Defendant's Order to Show Cause dated
June 16, 2021 be and the same is hereby DENIED without prejudice and
with leave to renew upon the submission of proper papers demonstrating
compliance with applicable requirements; and it is further
ORDERED, that Branch (D-2) of the Plaintiff's Order to Show Cause
dated August 23, 2021 be and the same is hereby DENIED without prejudice
and with leave to renew upon the submission of proper papers
demonstrating compliance with applicable requirements.
Any other relief requested not specifically herewith is hereby DENIED.
This constitutes the DECISION AND ORDER of this Court.
[1] Signed by the Hon. Joseph H. Lorintz, J.S.C., in the absence of the undersigned Justice.
[2]
The Court may refer to the subject children as the "G children" to
avoid confusion as both parties have remarried and their respective new
spouses also each have children of their own.
[3] See Defendant's Exhibit B, in evidence.
[4]
In determining whether a proposed relocation is in a child's [or
children's] best interests, courts are free to consider and give
appropriate weight to all of the factors that may be relevant to the determination. Matter of Argila v. Edelman, 174 AD3d 521 (2d Dept. 2019) (emphasis added). The Court finds the other factors discussed herein (see infra) to be relevant to it's determination.
[5] See Plaintiff's Exhibit 5, in evidence.
[6] See Plaintiff's Exhibit 2, in evidence.
[7] See Plaintiff's Exhibit 1, in evidence.
[8]
It also does not appear to the Court that the Father wants the
children to principally reside with him, as he does not request custody (see infra)."